"Bits & Pieces" - Commentary by Tony Seton

Bits & Pieces

Bits and pieces from this reporter’s notebook.

Da-deet-da-deet-da-deet-deet....Doth boggeleth the mind, the public statements that the public is expected to swallow. Like Joe Lieberman’s people saying they never heard from Al Gore, his former ticket leader, before the former veep announced his endorsement of Howard Dean. Says the Gore people, they tried to reach for former veep candidate several times before the story broke, but weren’t able to connect. Um, hello, this fails the plausibility test. It recalls the story during the Clinton days when Attorney General Janet Reno testified before Congress that she had been unable to reach National Security Council Advisor Anthony Lake for three days.

Da-deet-da-deet-da-deet-deet....Ozzy Osbourne fell of his ATV during a break from promoting his latest oeuvre. He broke his neck and a bunch of ribs but his injuries were not life threatening. There is some question about what there was to be threatened, but that question was clouded in heavy sedation.

Da-deet-da-deet-da-deet-deet....Al Sharpton probably ain’t the worst of the bunch although there have been times when he’s seemed to push for the role. The black donkey took a break from the political trail to host Saturday Night Live last weekend. And speaking of ass-inine, a bunch of NBC affiliates refused to carry the program, fearing, they said, that it would induce other prexy candidates to demand equal time. According to TV Guide Online, "Millions of Americans, meanwhile, refused to watch the show for fear it would continue to suck." Eloquence abounds.

Da-deet-da-deet-da-deet-deet....The Seattle City Council voted to allow its cabbies to now wear costumes. This because an Elvis impersonator got into trouble for not wearing the required black pants and "crisp" shirt. Voting to rescind a 1997 ordinance, they want to now allow appropriate costumes, that is, of a "readily identifiable and generally well-known public figure, personality or fictional character." No masks are allowed, and drivers can’t dress up to look like cops or firemen, or wear outfits that are too skimpy. Maybe this is to protect people who don’t have televisions.

Da-deet-da-deet-da-deet-deet....Authorities have matched the DNA of a missing North Dakota college student with blood in the suspect’s car. They don’t expect to find the girl alive. It’s not clear why they haven’t tortured the suspect, a convicted felon, into revealing her whereabouts.

Da-deet-da-deet-da-deet-deet....Trot around the globe, we do, with missiles and bribes, wreaking democracy on hapless populations...oh, good of us. But when Taiwan says they want to be free, we tell ‘em to shut their damn yap. The PRC, formerly known as Communist China but which appellation is losing its sting because of their obscene obeisance to the god of capital, continues to threaten to take back Taiwan. Since they are more in our financial pocket -- or we in theirs -- The Bush Boy declared his/our opposition to Taiwan’s bid for independence.

And that’s SetonnoteS...I’m Tony Seton.