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It's Good News Year   (12/31/02)
Perhaps you remember the song from the mid-Sixties that began, "It's good news week, someone dropped a bomb somewhere, contaminating atmosphere, and blackening the sky." It went on with a litany of mano a mano horror stories around the globe. That may be what the Bushies are singing tonight as they toast in the new year.

Wilds Too Wooly   (12/30/02)
Perhaps we can blame it on El Nino, which has dumped more rain on the area in just the past few weeks than it normally does in the six months season-to-date. Or maybe it's just that there are too many people on the planet and it has caused the Earth to spin crazily, leaving some people unable to hang on properly. Especially here in the North State, where it is particularly wild and wooly, all year 'round.

De-Rusting My Wings   (12/27/02)
Airline pilots with tens of thousands of flying hours report that they feel rusty after going on vacation for two weeks. I have three hundred hours, so my cellular memory is considerably more shallow, and the need for freshening concomitantly deeper. Indeed, if I don’t go up every week, I’m particularly suspicious of my flying mind; there is little room for Oops, I forgot to....

Diversity to Focus   (12/26/02)
This is what and who our country is about, not just the diversity, but the depth, not the crippled myopia of slothful, but the expanded consciousness of a resolute global mind. This is not a paean to patriotism, false or true, but an expression of excitement about human potential. I have long thought, and now more than ever, that America is the confluence of the greatness of East and West, and the birthplace of the future of mankind.

Merry Ho Ho Ho   (12/25/02)
Places like Lancaster and Palmdale are a speculators paradise, because it’s thought that a new LAX will be built there. It’s like a squashed cheeseball, long turned rancid; you drive for eons by strip malls offering every piece of trash that poor people can almost but not quite afford. And that’s just the apron to the main disaster, a freeway system that is overloaded with remarkably patient people. Or maybe they’re just numb.

It Snowed   (12/24/02)
It actually snowed on Thursday, which is maybe the third such event since I moved here five years ago. Most of Redding didn't get the white stuff, but Casa Linda is perched at 1100 feet, so in the mid-afternoon, the temperature dropped just a coupla extra degrees to produce the white stuff. Big honkin' flakes that at first were just beautiful and then created a coupla inches of slush.

Time to Go   (12/23/02)
It was late in the afternoon when the man left his message on the answering machine at his lawyer's office. His call wasn't answered personally because it was a busy time, being the week before Christmas and everyone was on other calls. But when they retrieved his message a few minutes later, everything shifted. He said he was going to kill himself.

The Maybe Memo   (12/20/02)
This email was allegedly discovered in the trash by a maintenance worker who was subsequently laid off in another round of budget cuts. It seems to be a communication to Governor Gray Davis from his chief political advisor Garry South, though its authenticity could not be confirmed, or even reasonably inferred.

Elephant Dung   (12/19/02)
Last week, the head of the state GOP said that any legislator who voted to increase taxes would find himself facing an immediate recall campaign. This is kinda crazy, since California faces a $35 billion deficit and even if they sold Hollywood to Japan they couldn't pay down the whole debt. New or increased taxes will be required, and the GOP leadership knows it.

Stormin' Mother   (12/18/02)
I took advantage of the relative clemency to walk down through one of my favorite places of worship, Tennessee Valley, to the ocean. The Pacific was in frothy tumult, with waves rising twenty feet pounding themselves onto the beach, their backwash smashing into successors, creating towers of spume. The beach was gone, actually, or inundated; to reappear some time when the wave action quiets itself.

On the Outs   (12/17/02)
Law is no longer the law for hundreds of thousands of now-questioning worshipers. He leaves behind chaos in the church -- a good thing, certainly -- and many pedophelic victims, not a good thing. Regrettably too, he and his ilk have added to the lexicon the term "priest abuse survivor."

Safe 'n Secure   (12/16/02)
The Ahwahnee may or may not be fire-prone, and the fact that it has survived three-quarters of a century without a conflagration is proof of nothing. Except that so far they have handled matters properly, and there was nothing to indicate that policies had changed or that fire prevention efforts had grown lax.

Book Covers   (12/13/02)
He was stationed in Monterey for a while, so he knows something about the extraordinary diversity our of culture. He can't stand Bush, and believes that our military adventurism is a prescription for disaster; he's talked with his reservist son about going to Canada. He is also up on education and the environment, the national debt and other significant issues of the day.

Empty Lott   (12/12/02)
If he does get pushed out, it will only be for cosmetic reasons; not a single Senate synapse will shift. Symbolically it would demonstrate some minor degree of sensitivity, rather than sensibility, and it would be political rather than societal. But in today's climate, those to the left of the right will grasp at any straw in the wind.

People at the Head   (12/11/02)
If he'd dumped 'em in a recycling bin, he might not be in such a pickle, but the DA is considering criminal charges, and a whole lotta folks have called upon the once-estimable Bates to resign. Bates says he did the deed and he's apologized for the act, blaming fatigue. His supporters think he should have to do public service, as the mayor.

Fragments   (12/10/02)
One of the prosecutors complained that the defense was "dragging out the body of a dead girl." Ryder rose from her chair in astonished outrage; hey, even over-drugged shoplifters have rights. The judge should have tossed the prosecutress in the pokey for contempt, but didn't. Of course, it was Southern California, where such conduct is hardly noteworthy.

I'll Take California   (12/09/02)
There’s a lot of wealth and a lot of poverty in The Sunshine State. From what I could see in my travels, a huge number of housing units are being constructed, much of it on land that would otherwise have been a slimy bog. Once it was screens, and now it's air conditioners, that make life possible in a land that the desk clerk at my hotel referred to as Jurassic Park. And she likes it.

Doors to Sunshine   (12/06/02)
There had been a gorgeous sunrise that morning, a bright orange orb climbing between layers of clouds, but the rest of the day had been overcast, with showers pockmarking the central part of The Sunshine State. It was still warm and humid that evening, though cooling ever so slightly under a gentle westerly flow, not quite energetic enough to be called a breeze.

...Through Leaves, Over Bridges   (12/05/02)
Linda had been distancing herself from me, not without reason, and that was surely not a good thing. She said I had too short a fuse. What, I screamed...no I didn’t. I said she was right, and I made up my mind that it should be longer. And I made it longer. I haven’t gotten seriously angry since. At least not toward her; some drivers have not escaped my wrath, though unbeknownst to them.

Bits & Pieces   (12/04/02)
Advertising has truly lost contact with reality. Consider a full-page pitch in a weekly syndicated Sunday newspaper insert: "The love affair with Thermacare continues as people kiss pain goodbye." Sure, it's nice to have relief from pain, and we'll presume that their claims are true, but a love affair? Sounds like a tired copywriter and absent supervision from the client.

Morse, Just Morse   (12/03/02)
Perhaps it was that John Thaw, who plays Morse, decided he'd had enough. (Kinda like how Sir Arthur Conan Doyle got tired of Sherlock Holmes and killed him off, though he was subsequently revived at the request of Queen Victoria.) Thaw is a fine actor, and brings to the Morse character a consistency-cum-nuance that any mystery afficionado or just plain viewer has to respect, if not thoroughly enjoy.

Coyote Kill   (12/02/02)
Usually it's in the middle of the night, when people are in their beds the dark forces of nature play out their hidden schemes. What happens is that a pack of coyotes trap an animal, and then start howling. Sometimes, the victim gets a chance to scream for its life, briefly, then the coyotes howl again during the kill.

Why We Give Thanks   (11/28/02)
Still, I can't imagine that the Pilgrims started something that could end this badly. Our destiny may be manifest, but no one said the road was straight. Rather, I think matters will get worse, dramatically worse, over the next coupla years. And then, from amidst the depravity and chaos, fueled by desperation and the special character of our great country, we will somehow find our way back to the path.

Cenla of the Bayou   (11/27/02)
I had gone to shoot a whole slew of on-camera pieces for some productions on collaborative law. The reason for the location is that my new and good friend Ross Foote sits on the bench there. As his daddy did. There's a lotta tradition in Alexandria. Some might think too much, with the obverse being the implication of too little progress, but that wouldn't be entirely fair.

Mindless Miss   (11/26/02)
Throw in raw meat -- and that's what these Miss contests are all about -- and you're likely to generate some carnivorous behavior. Which is what happened. A reporter wrote an article in a local Nigerian paper wondering if Islam founder Muhammed might not have approved of the pageant and maybe even thought to marry one of the contestants.

Clackin' Constipation   (11/25/02)
The fact is that writing is therapy for me. I get constipated if I can’t clack. Oh sure, there are the old quill-'n-parchment, but I can’t write as quickly as I can type, not nearly, plus my hand cramps quickly. Surely I shouldn’t have to endure two long days of traveling without a computer. I mean, I would if I had to, for Linda, but....

Fall...Yum    (11/22/02)
Fall is beautiful here in the North State, as it probably is in most places. Like spring, it is a gracious bumper between the longer, more extreme seasons, and both are much more the choice if one could choose. Sadly, they are but short respites between too cold and much too hot. But we love 'em while they last.

Bits & Pieces    (11/21/02)
The media went wild world-wide, wondering about what might have possessed the self-styled King-of-Pop to pull such a stunt. Kinda late to begin wondering about Jackson. If you saw a picture of him last week when he was testifying in court, it's clear that fruitcake is not just a holiday offering.

Whitemail    (11/20/02)
Then came the diversity movement, and women and peopleofcolor were in such demand that no-talent stutterers were hauled off the street if they had breasts, a dark tan, or a missing limb. After a while, television newscasts featured more colors than a Trinitron explosion, all garbled and prosthetic, and having little to do with the news. White males needed not apply.

Absent Ain't Current   (11/19/02)
Back in the old days, when life moved a lot slower, it might have made sense for people who weren't going to be in their home district on Election Day to have a chance to have their voice heard. But nowadays, there are two big reasons, both electronic, why people should wait until the last moment to vote.

Really Cookin'   (11/18/02)
Also, for the record, not being the gourmet cook that she is, I would have plunked down a few hunnert -- maybe even six or seven -- and had a stove that would have been more than adequate for my needs. Not that I hadn't been lobbying for a new stove, but the one we've been using came with the house, and is a model that first came out around the time Benjamin Franklin was flying kites in thunderstorms.

Fone Fleecing   (11/15/02)
The actual complaints were mostly about false advertising and using the telephone to harass customers. The companies were also accused of using tricky billing systems to further bilk their customers. They were forced to forgive $500 million in customer bills, return all uncashed checks, and pay the feds a $5 million fine. In addition to ending their telephone-based scam.

Heroes of Our Own Time   (11/14/02)
Everyone would like to prevent forest fires, murders, or abortions, so we should be able to find solutions. Yet over-the-edge enviros refuse to endorse low-brush clearing fires, gun-nuts refuse to disarm snipers, and born-agains refuse to support birth control education to prevent unwanted pregnancies.

Bits & Pieces   (11/13/02)
The commission announces its inspections three months in advance, and allows hospitals to choose the patient files to be examined. Further, while the commission reported only a dozen fatalities from iatrogenic infections since 1995, the Trib found about 75,000 such deaths in just one year. Said the commission president, "We have missed things."

A Class Act   (11/12/02)
A powerhouse of a political figure, a mother of five successful children, Nancy could have been imperious and difficult to work with, but quite the contrary, she was attentive, generous, and dedicated to getting it right. She knew she was working with professionals, but she had her own opinions.

First Rain   (11/11/02)
Water streamed over the side of the gutters, so when the downpour poured down less, I donned my foul-weather gear and pulled the ten-foot ladder from behind the storage shed. Carefully positioning it in the soddening ground next to the drain spout, I climbed skyward with a stick. A little poke and the leaves succumbed to the pressure of the pounds of water behind them. A virtual tsunami flushed south onto a patch of cement below.

Bits & Pieces   (11/08/02)
Harvey Pitt may be gone, but not yet William Webster, who was named to lead the federal oversight of corporate crookedness. It should be familiar territory for him, if he stays. Webster has been accused of firing an accounting firm which was auditing the company of which he was a director. They were dumped because they warned him of some, er, hem discrepancies. Webster said he couldn't recall being so informed before he fired them.

Stumbling over Molière   (11/07/02)
I was trying to remember a with-apologies-to Molière line by a Wall Street columnist, and it probably had to do with economists. Off I went huntin' and found a "with the guts..." quote about lawyers and judges, and another about priests, but neither was associated with the brilliant French écrivant. Not that it isn't out there; it just ain't here.

There's Always Next Time   (11/06/02)
At least there was a donkey in the White House in 1994, so there was some balance. Last night, the news was bad from the get-go, with a highly-vulnerable Jeb Bush retaining his gubernatorial post in Florida because his opponent was a remarkably inept wannabe with money but no brains. Then followed the asses getting kicked out of SenateLand, delivering the full Congress to the elephants.

Criminal Contempt   (11/05/02)
John Petrucelli -- also known as Johnny Boy and Fat Face -- was 25 at the time he stabbed a 17-year-old, in an apparent attempt to emulate his father's murderous lifestyle. The mother of his victim confronted the killer two years after the murder and promised justice. "I said to him, 'If it takes my last breath, I will get you,'" she recounted outside court after the verdict. "Well, Johnny Boy, I got you."

Off the Road Again   (11/04/02)
The flight was over two hours, but the refreshments consisted only of a slice of pound cake, and the perfunctory beverages. Cocktails and wine, once three dollars, are now five bucks a pop, and the little bottles are no bigger. You need to bring your own victuals, because there are no decent restaurants in the terminals any more; just rows of fast-food puke-oriums, and over-priced coffee bars.

Collaboratin'   (11/01/02)
Collaboration is a really big deal. It’s a sea change in social conduct. In collaborative family law, instead of lawyers becoming gladiators, as they had been taught to do in law school, they sit down together with their clients and the four people figure out what is the best settlement of the divorcing couple’s affairs.

Leaving the Kids   (10/31/02)
I won't worry about the critters. Buster will be seen to by our caring neighbor, a practice that's been going on for ten years. The kitty-cats? They're not as sociable; in fact, she probably won't see them. But they'll do the feline thang, out and about, and will sashay up to us when we've been home again long enough to forget to miss them.

Bits & Pieces    (10/30/02)
Coming out of the tragedy of the Wellstone story last week, one of their bimbettes got all giggly over the story of a couple of deer breaking through the window of McDonald's. Not very funny to begin with, particularly to the people who were injured. And to then make a joke about "a meal for a buck" somehow didn't sound fitting right after reporting that the conscience of the Senate and seven others had died in a plane crash.

Securing Mott Airport   (10/29/02)
The two Dunsmuir security aces have filed a federal lawsuit against the sheriff, claiming the raid was a vendetta because they'd criticized him in the past. They say their civil rights were violated. They claim they had authority from the Dunsmuir city council to protect the airport, and that the sheriff is just getting back at them having canceled its protection contract with him.

Election Day Registration   (10/28/02)
It's already done in six other states and has increased voter turnout significantly, without seeing any increase in fraud. The concern among the incumbent pols is that they could be swept out of office by a last-minute tide of unhappy balloters, whereas now they feel relatively safe in the hands of the diminishing electorate that has to be registered at least 15 days prior to the election.

Privacy vs. Security?   (10/25/02)
The sniper team, through messages left at the scene and phone calls to police and priests, seems to have been trying to be caught. Indeed, if it weren’t for their persistence, it’s questionable whether they might not have assassinated another ten people before they were stumbled upon by the police.

Titanic Struggle   (10/24/02)
I would like to think that we are here for a purpose -- a good purpose -- and are not merely to run around like headless chickens, as a perverse diversion for some deistic chess players who get off on chaos, pain, and blood. I would like to think that we have within us the ability to straighten out our lives, to end the obscenity of violence, ignorance, and general sinfulness.

Random-Schmandom   (10/23/02)
I can kinda understand how some perve would get his jollies passing the metal detector around my cute wife, but I gotta think that the only reason for wanding me is because I likely look easily annoy-able. And really, why would anyone take such a job except to irritate people? They probably didn't past the test for meter maid, who, it is said, eat their young.

Hapax Legomena   (10/22/02)
An example of one of the obscure words (or phrase) that I wouldn't likely use but am herein is hapax legomenon* which is defined as "A word or form that has only one recorded use." An example of the phrase was from Linda Tripp requoted by William Safire when she referred to Bill Clinton as a "schwonk." I haven't a clue what the word means, although I would hazard a guess that it might be a conjunction of schmuck and wonk.

It's a Crime   (10/21/02)
Turns out Matthew Dowdy was lying, though his motive was unclear, though there was speculation that he might have been going after a share of the $500,000 reward. He faces a maximum penalty of only six months in jail. He is the second person to mislead the police. A fast-food worker who wanted the day off called in a false report during the second week of the investigation.

Aging, Not Gracefully   (10/18/02)
It wouldn’t have meant much, of course, if people didn’t get hot water or the lights didn’t work, but under his aegis, they had it all. This venerable resort hotel sits on the oldest golf course west of the Mississippi in a community that venerates golf -- there are 23 golf courses on the Monterey Peninsula -- but at least on the lodging side, they seem to have forgotten the meaning and purpose of old-fashioned service.

Dumb-Da-Dumb-Dumb   (10/17/02)
There's a certain irony in comparing the Bush administrations, when you consider how Machiavellian was the father, and what a dummy -- in the Charlie McCarthy sense -- was his vice president. Now we have the dummy in the top post, and his manipulator is the Machiavellian veep. Not to slander The Great Prince, who was a brilliant mind and didn't need a dim-witted foible through whom to practice his political machinations.

Domestic Terrorism   (10/16/02)
The first response of the White House, underscoring the venality of these morally-bankrupt deviants, was the tired mantra that we don't need new laws, just to enforce the ones already on the books. A few hours later, perhaps jolted by a re-reading of the political tea leaves, they announced "We have asked the ATF to have their experts look into and explore the issues involved to determine if this would be an effective crime-fighting tool."

Here Come Duh Flood   (10/15/02)
Maybe it was the plastic water bottle lying in the parking lot that tipped me off. Time for a flood, I said to myself. You can't say something like that out loud here in the wilds of the North State. People would think you were a terrorist from the Middle East, or from God, and planning to blow up the Shasta Dam. May they all be hunkered down in their basements when the time comes.

Put Saddam on Hold   (10/14/02)
The bombings in Bali make it abundantly clear that Iraq is not the problem. We have the technology to track these killers, and we have the resources to bribe and coerce those who would look the other way than ours. We should go after the terrorists, wherever they are, stomping the governments that protect them. Iraq can wait. We cannot play games with Saddam when fanatical terrorists are striking around the world at will.

Hi-Ho, FoHi   (10/11/02)
There were a lot of happy people. Occasional shrieks of delight cut through the crowd re-uning for the 40^th anniversary of their graduation from high school. For some, it was the first time in four decades that they'd seen their classmates. You could see on the faces how so many of them had enjoyed that time so long ago, when life made a lot more sense.

Perish duh Tought   (10/10/02)
Au jus has been stumping food servers for a long time. At a prime rib restaurant in Chicago 25 years ago, a waitress asked if I wanted some au jus too. She was so pretty, I had to say yes. But what about the food chain execs, and the advertising people, and the production staff. Did none of them take French, or eat in a quality dining establishment, that they might learn the truth?

Sending a Message   (10/09/02)
I'll sign on to the concept, I said, so long as we can come up with a good carrot, too. Maybe we should distribute a half-billion notebook computers with Internet connections to young people throughout the Moslem world. Let people see for themselves that we are better than we are bad, that they have been fed a crock of lies. Maybe we can start a revolution against the mullahs.

Good Bureaucrats   (10/08/02)
You can tell how topsy-turvy has become the world when the star performers are the people behind the counter at the California Department of Motor Vehicles and those serving at a local Social Security office. Both operations seem to run very smoothly, the folks treat their clients courteously, and the places are clean. Indeed, the service I received was so good that I would recommend that local retails should take a lesson. My, how times have changed.

Irreliable Untelligence   (10/07/02)
Ya gotta think with names like that, they should have been on everybody's watch list, so when The Almighty Ashcroft trumpeted the case as "a textbook example" of cooperation with the state and locals in the waronterrorism, ya gotta wonder whose textbook. First of all, a third of the chargees weren't caught. Second, these were people who were planning to go to Afghanistan to fight against U.S. forces, which may show zeal but not strategic brilliance.

Falling for Autumn   (10/04/02)
I know the weather has broken when I can push my shorts to the back of the shelf. From June through August, wearing slacks is just too much in the local heat. And I hate shorts. My religion says that if god had wanted us to wear shorts, he would have given us shorter legs. My objection is that I can't walk where I want to with shorts, because there is poison oak everywhere, salivating at the sight of my unprotected gams.

The Leaky Dinghy   (10/03/02)
For the longest time, I've been sailing along in a leaky dinghy with the name "Hope" fading from the stern. If I weren't thinking of jumping ship, I might get someone to scrape off the last remaining flakes of paint, and re-christen the craft "Wistfulness." Because hope is sailing away on a sullen tide, and I'm left ruing what might have been; particularly the extraordinary potential of those beings we call human.

In the News...  (10/02/02)
A coupla dusty reports have been brought to light that indicate that our government handed over biological agents -- including anthrax, botulism, and West Nile virus -- to Iraq. Such irony, n'est-ce pas? According to the reports, the decision to send to our now-mortal enemies these potential weapons of our own destruction were considered naive (at best) at the time, and but was justified because Iraq was fighting Iran at the time, and we hated them more.

Bits & Pieces  (10/01/02)
Back in 1988 an inspector at a nuclear plant in Ohio reported that there was a problem of leakage and corrosion around the containment vessel. He said that the core issue was the plant culture, where the management ignored the craft workers. He was told to change his report. He refused and resigned instead. Fourteen years later, the reactor vessel had been eaten away to the point of nearly rupturing. Evidence was in plain sight for years. No one did anything about it.


Black Byrd  (9/30/02)
Then, however, a passenger complained that she and her child were afraid to fly with Byrd on the plane, apparently as a result of his encounter with wand-er, so the pilot (also black) asked the Sheriff-Coroner of Siskiyou County, California, to get off the plane. Which he did, without any apparent disruption; he then drove two hours to the Sacramento airport to continue his travels. Commented his campaign manager, "They didn't tell him to get to the back of the bus. They told him to get off."

Pointy, Not Sharp  (9/27/02)
Did anyone else happen to notice that it was the French who went into rescue more than a hundred American children from danger zones in the Ivory Coast? The U.S. military arrived on the scene hours later. Not that it would necessarily have made a difference to the safety of the children, but in fact, the French did the rescuing. And I gotta wonder why with all our military might -- what with us being the global policeman ready to stomp any third-world nation who would sass us -- why we didn't get to the scene sooner.

Flying Off the Rust  (9/26/02)
This past week, I made two flights. One was a trip on my own to Santa Rosa, which takes four hours to reach by car and one by plane. The second was a flight to Marin to connect with a lawyer from Wisconsin who wanted to meet with Linda. We were back and forth in less than three hours of flying time; driving would have taken eight. Both trips were for business in IRS terms; both were a pleasure to fly. Gotta stay proficient.

Silence Isn't Golden  (9/25/02)
If people buy the Bush bluster on November Fifth, this country will have illustrated the problem of what happens when an electorate is politically and intellectually illiterate. The grotesquery of the Bush-Lite posture -- the cowboy so tough he doesn't need any friends -- is not only shameful and destructive it is dangerous and scary. From the environment to basic civil rights, the very heart of our nation is under siege by an executive oligarchy of unbalanced, immoralists who threaten the very survival of our society.

Child Welfare  (9/24/02)
Beyond despairing the circumstances that brought these two regrettable examples of homo excretia to our attention, we might think about how we might reach their confreres and apers, and get through to them with a message that will inhibit their conduct before they go public.

Bits & Pieces  (9/23/02)
Also in the Washington courts system, the state supremes ruled that photographing or videotaping up a woman's skirt in public doesn't violate a state voyeurism law. This was a unanimous ruling. They said the law only protects people where they have a reasonable expectation of privacy. The state had argued that people reasonably expected to have privacy under their clothes. It was not reported what was under the judges' black robes.

Before the Fall  (9/20/02)
The degree of narcissism was kinda scary. First of all that they were so young, and worried about aging. Second that they had the money and would spend it erasing wrinkles. And third, they seemed not to object to showing themselves as so remarkably shallow. I suppose that's part of the shallowness. Like the gorgeous girl-'n-guy in Annie Hall who explained that they were able to get along so well because they were so superficial.

Loafin'  (9/19/02)
Then, somehow, like the swallows finding San Juan Capistrano, at age twenty, these girls suddenly looked like fifty. One wag suggested that it was simply part of the natural life cycle of the two-titted, back-flopped, twig-spreader; a ubiquitous lower-end breed found plentifully throughout the southern states, and in most other loci of untended rurality.

Side-Splitting Stasis  (9/18/02)
My dear friends Moe and Larry are convinced that my association with them is converting me to conservatism, and the fact is that I am shedding some of my old liberal thinking. No, not all liberal ideas are bad. In fact, virtually all of them have their heart in the right place; it's their implementation that causes the problems. And in truth, guys, most of the problems were caused in negotiations with ridiculous right-wingers who forced compromises that watered down the solution to marginal effectiveness.

Bits & Pieces  (9/17/02)
Gary Copeland, the candidate of the 98,000 member Libertarian Party, lost his endorsement over the weekend. The party big-wigs weren't happy that Copeland -- a Druid, but that wasn't a factor -- spat upon a radio talk show host. Not that if he hadn't spat he would have been a good governor, but now we'll never know. The radio guy's crime? He turned off the candidate's microphone.

He's Baaack  (9/16/02)
I had called a half-hour earlier for the results of the lab tests, but had been told that they weren't in yet; I could try again the next morning after eleven, or maybe call back in two hours. I sure wouldn't like a job like that -- dealing with people with a real reason to feel terribly concerned. In this case, to have no news wasn't as bad as having bad news, but it surely wasn't good news.

The Silence of Sounds   (9/13/02)
It used to be that flipping someone off meant something. But in this fast-paced ever-changing world, the gesture has lost much of its meaning. Oh, not in polite society, of course, but certainly in the out-'n-about. And no, money doesn't mean manners, by any means.

Kitty-Comm   (9/12/02)
I sit forward on the edge of my desk chair as I type. Most of the seat is taken by Howard and Blue, who are purring up a storm in advance of a late morning nap. These cats purr very loudly. The Lovely Linda -- their pseudo-mom -- opines that any animal rescued from the humane society knows it got out with it's life. It mighta been by just hours, or certainly days. Hence, they are very grateful.

Reflections from the Mount   (9/11/02)
Shortly after midnight on September 10^th, I began my 53^rd circuit 'round Ole Sol. As momentous as was that moment, I slept through it. If my calculations are correct, I've now orbited some 30,370,080,000 miles and spun some 474,825,000 more. We be flying, dude. Other like celebrants of this date include Arnold Palmer, and once included Roger Maris and Nikita Khrushchev.

Iraqi Irony   (9/10/02)
For those of us who hold the presumption that this insane saber-rattling over Iraq is not about true insanity but rather is about political agendas and egos -- and that presumption may require a stretch -- there may be some comfort in the fact that there is an obvious and easy way out of this mess.

You Don't Look Blue-ish   (9/09/02)
My stepson-in-law is an American citizen from Jordan. Linda and I have advised him that in addition to using his American name, he lose his Middle Eastern accent. Not that we don't find it charming. Not that we think he should stop teaching his young sons Arabic. But out in the real world today, if there were another attack pinned on young Arabic-looking men associated with known terrorists, we suggest that it would be a safer thing if he spoke American as though he were locally-grown.

Poli-Trips   (9/06/02)
When his base of petrified primitives learned that their boy signed a pledge to sign a Gay Pride Day proclamation, if he were elected, they went, to use the vernacular, ballistic. Simon's campaign people quickly "explained" that some minor aide had filled out the questionnaire and signed Simon's name to it, all without checking with the candidate. I suppose it could have happened that way...er-hem, could have...but that's kinda like Simon admitting that he hired a bunch of idiots to make mistakes for me.

Home-Work   (9/05/02)
One of the repair jobs I needed to do on myself when I grew up was to learn how to repair things. As in fixing things around the house and in the yard. While I had done chores like shoveling snow and mowing lawns, I never learned about basic home maintenance, or what to do when pipes or wires or boards needed replacement. Normally, this would have been the province of the pater, but mine, who worked hard at being a shrink, plus he had back problems, hired people to take care of that kinda thing.

The Wuss Contagion   (9/04/02)
The other day this line popped into my head: Redding is a toxic wuss site. Where the phrase came from, I don't know. It was less a function of thinking about the city in those terms, and more of an assemblage of sounds that suddenly spoke in the mind's ear. What with the mercury heading toward 113 that afternoon, this place felt toxic; hence the association. The wuss part reflects my growing despair with a community reluctant to adopt higher standards.

Not Selling Out   (9/03/02)
After dinner, sitting out on the porch, watching the lights of San Francisco twinkle in the distance, I asked if they thought they might have kept their social values had they gone a more lucrative route. No way, I was told. It got me thinking about whether I would have the values I do today if I had stayed at ABC News. I know that I would have been making a year now what it will cost them for their son's college education, but I don't know that I would have kept my socio-political edge.

Shelter Cove   (9/02/02)
There are plenty of reasons to learn how to fly, and one of them I only discovered this summer. It is the approach to runway 12 -- we pilots pronounce that one-two -- at Shelter Cove. The airfield there sits on a delicious green plateau that noses into the Pacific, roughly half-way between Mendocino and Eureka. The 3400-foot runway is surrounded by a nine-hole golf course and a handful of bed-'n-breakfasts, motels, and food-eries. It is the perfect escape, especially for people who live in the Northern Sacramento Valley, where summer temperatures climb past a 110.

All's Not Evil   (8/30/02)
I don't believe in evil. I think, rather, that many people are confused, many are desperate, and many have lost hope. For too long, too many people have gone along to get along, coughing up agreement that the emperor is snazzily garbed. Our collective memory of honor, decency, integrity, morality, compassion, humanity, quality, and purpose has faded. It won't disappear until we're all dead, but then it would be too late.

The Devil You Know   (8/29/02)
California Republican gubernatorial candidate Bill Simon has once-again performed cosmetic surgery on his funeral. For those not paying attention to California politics, the Simon campaign announced last week that they had decided to eliminate 34 positions to save $1.5 million to buy more television time. You might feel sorry for the guy if he'd done anything right, but it's been a mess from the get-go.

Triple Play   (8/28/02)
With polls already showing public support for the sport in the crapper, the owners and players are planning to insult the remaining few in the figurative stands by wiping out the end of the season. Even if they don't strike, even if the strike is a little one, these yahoos -- and both are reprehensible in their greedy culpability -- are gonna lose more of their fan base. Maybe they think it doesn't matter.

Not Caesar's Wife   (8/27/02)
She further exploded credulity when she announced that when she goes to The Hill to lobby, "Staff members are pretty junior and may or may not know who I am." Puh-leeze, they're gonna send in some putz who's not gonna know he's talkin' to the wife of the Senate's top dog? The lowest volunteer sent for coffee is gonna know who she is and why's she there, and it ain't a social call.

Nature's a Real Mother   (8/26/02)
We hear the coyotes. They hunt in packs, and the last sounds you hear before they howl are the death cries of their kill. Buster likes to go out on the deck and holler back at 'em, and judging from his expression, he seems to be saying he's sorry he couldn't make the party.

'Nother Peak Experience   (8/23/02)
My pal Rich and I took off from Benton Airpark and I poked the nose of the Skyhawk upward, planning to find some clear air at some point up the ladder. The trim was set for a 500-feet/minute climb; not fast, but it was an efficient use of fuel. A slow, deliberate climb was kinda what the day called for, and our obeisance was rewarded with a stunning view as Mt. Shasta revealed over the top of the smoke layer.

Reparations Schmeparations   (8/22/02)
A demonstration in Washington, D.C. on Saturday by a few thousand blacks illuminated just how far 'round the bend the diversity train has pulled. The crowd called for the federal government to pay reparations for the slavery and decades of discrimination against their predecessors. The demonstrators want the money to come to them, of course; they think that they earned it through the suffering of their forebears.

Corrupt with Power   (8/21/02)
While I think it's true that in some cases, power will corrupt an individual, I go more with the notion that some corrupt people are drawn to power. That it is the pathology of certain damaged minds -- they thrive on control for its own sake. Perhaps they are afraid of losing what they have, or they don't think that they have enough. Something about them is perverted, and they seek power to leverage their position.

Easily Distracted   (8/20/02)
They are so anxious to get out, they are literally standing atop each other as I edge the door open. Then there's this blur as they tear out into the bedroom and the hallway. This is followed by a brief stop to contemplate the new freedom, and moments later, the two are chowing down noisily on their kibble. They sound like they've not eaten in days, although the litter box would attest otherwise.

Active Matrix Community   (8/19/02)
We did it with our silence. There were people around the sheriff who knew he was a bad man, but none told the FBI. And there's no way the high school killer suddenly decided -- without a history -- to start shooting people; there had to be indications in the preceding dozen years or so that this boy was in trouble, signs that were either misread or ignored.

Bits & Pieces   (8/16/02)
Majority Leader Dick Armey got a bill through the Lower Chamber than would prohibit the program. What many found irksome -- we're being polite, now -- was that General John and his loonies took this PR stunt and brought it home, by suggesting that utility meter-readers and postal carriers get into the act. The Post Office said No-way, and private industry virtually scoffed at the notion. Who wants their service and delivery people to be viewed as spies?

Somber Numbers   (8/15/02)
Peter-Tom-'n-Dan were somber and all tight-wrapped in the flag. They talked incessantly about how good the president looked and they somberly cheer-leaded the waronterrorism. But as they had for twenty years, they failed to keep us well informed about what was really going on -- e.g, the corruption of politics, the crumbling of our corporate edifice, and the disasters in education, health care, and the environment.

Observations   (8/14/02)
Understand that my requests were to people I don't know and who haven't a clue who I am, but one of them signed off "Have a Great Day!!!!!" and the other "Until we speak again...stay blessed and unstressed..." Gets yer blood flowin', doesn't it, all that ambient excitement, live and in color, though neither. I wonder how long it takes these people to pull of their masks at night.

All God's Critters   (8/13/02)
I tried to swat him several times and only managed to sting my knuckles. Being in a generous mood, I suddenly wondered if he might be more than just a fly; David Hedison returns. But I didn't really think that it might be a person. Rather, I thought that it might just be a fly. Did I really feel it was my role to send him into the fly hereafter?

"Coloring the News"   (8/12/02)
McGowan's indictment of the major media is not as harsh as it is thorough. He illuminates both incidents and policies that have led to mis-educating the general public. He does give them their due for errata and retractions, though, he notes, such corrections usually came late and in the back of the paper, while the knee-jerk charges were headlined on page one. That's always the way it is.

Items   (8/09/02)
Despite drawing a salary of $131,000, she got the California Highway Patrol to chauffeur her hither and yon on some 200 trips over two years, at a cost of over $75,000. Not a big deal in the overall scheme of things, especially when it comes to self-directed largesse in government, but it doesn't look good at a time when California faces a $25 billion deficit.

From the Horse's...    (8/08/02)
It's kinda strange that the Iraqi dictator would feel a need to reassure his people. Yes, it would be the people who would suffer the brunt of the attack, just like they did during the first Gulf War. But there doesn't seem to be any significant local opposition to Saddam, organized or otherwise, so why should he bother? Perhaps it's just an opportunity to rally the Arab world to his side while castigating Washington.

Bits & Pieces   (8/07/02)
The 31-year-old got out, but her subsequent conflagration burned 467,000 acres, destroyed 323 homes, and forced 30,000 people to evacuate. Many of those burned-out were furious with the federal prosecutor who declined to press charges. The uncharged woman was unavailable for comment after his announcement; she was winging her way to New York City for a morning television show appearance.

Making Babies   (8/06/02)
There's a case in the Bay Area where a fertility clinic mixed up the test tubes in a couple of artificial inseminations, and a woman(1) wound up having a son that was supposed to have been born by another woman(2). In this case, a couple(2) had used the husband's sperm to fertilize a donor egg, but it was implanted into another woman(1). That woman(1) bore the child, a boy now 16 months, and the sperm's mother(2) -- it does get complicated -- wants him "back."

Minor Problems   (8/05/02)
The problem for news organizations was that they don't like to use the names of sexual assault victims. The idea is to protect the victim from excess public scrutiny, but in this case it was really a non-issue, and one over which there has been far too much hand-wringing. The massive publicity contributed to the end of the girls' abduction, and likely saved their lives. Case-o closed-o.

Symbol Simon   (8/03/02)
The gubernatorial race was Simon's to lose, and he's likely to do just that, and by a margin that will make Lungren feel better. Worse for Republicans, Simon's collapse may actually hurt other GOP candidacies around the country, and help shift the House to donkey control. It's not over yet, of course.

Depth of Depravity   (8/02/02)
There are places you don't travel to at night, we all know that, and most people know that there are some places that you don't go to during the day. No, I'm not talking about Redding, but about some parts of some cities where you dasn't go if you are different. And in the worst of those places, it's not safe to go even if you're a local.

Clinton's Cross   (8/01/02)
Whenever some of us hear his name -- let alone see him on the public stage again -- there's a feeling of disgust. He disgraced the office of President of the United States. He got away with perjury and obstruction of justice because enough people viewed him as just smarmy and weak, rather than a criminal. His escape doesn't give him license to speak up and remind us of his squalid tenure.

Exploitation of Justice   (7/31/02)
A case in point was filed by a New York man against four fast food chains. The 56-year-old maintenance worker claims that his obesity, heart disease and diabetes are due to their selling him the crap he ate that made him that way. He said they failed to adequately label their products for the inherent dangers in the predominantly salt-'n-grease menu.

Commune, Y'All   (7/30/02)
Santa Clara County, California has been told that starting with the fall election, they have to provide ballots in Tagalog so that Filipino-Americans could have an easier time of understanding the election process. The ballots are already available in Spanish, Chinese and Vietnamese. Alameda County, which includes the city of Oakland, is wondering if they might not have to produce ballots in Dari and Punjabi.

Target Baghdad   (7/29/02)
Considering the lack of character of this administration -- so many are two-faced oleaginous crooks who are only interested in their political future ala Bush -- an attack on this sovereign if mis-guided nation 6,210 miles away seems inevitable. I thought invadin' was something America frowned upon, at least theoretically. Now it's talked about as if they were selecting the site of the next Superbowl.

Nothing on Television   (7/26/02)
I was actually surprised how bad the news is, not only from a content standpoint, but production as well. The vapidity of the anchors is breath-taking. These people wouldn't know a news story if it bit 'em in the keyboard. And they look intelligent -- okay, that's stretching the point too far -- they look almost awake, compared to the sports and weather yahoos who are hyperventilating cretins with a Prozac smile. Watch all ya want, but you won't have a clue about what's going on in the world.

Pitt Stop   (7/25/02)
Also mismanaging his public image -- imagine someone trying to run downstairs backwards -- is Harvey Pitt, the head of the SEC. A corporate lawyer, he used to represent some of the firms now plagued by scandal. In the face of public calls for his resignation, from higher-ups in both parties, Pitt made flaming new headlines that have even his supporters shaking their heads.

Honorable Men   (7/24/02)
The Lovely Linda asked the other morning if every major company weren't guilty of some sorta accountin' shenanigans, what with all the headlines about one company after another being named as being under investigation by the SEC or the FBI or some other authority. Let me say first of all that Linda is no slouch when it comes to recognizing malfeasance.

Uncle Buster   (7/23/02)
The kitties were not quite so pleased about seeing Buster, not right off. I mean, consider he's a hundred times their weight, and looks like a couch, in motion. But this remarkable dog is very smart, too, as he knows how not to crowd the new arrivals. He makes himself available, and tries to demonstrate that despite his size, he's friendly.

The More I Love Flying   (7/22/02)
This past weekend found me driving instead of flying to the Bay Area. I had even reserved a plane, but canceled the reservation and made it a road trip. One of the reasons was that I needed to get around to various places, which meant I would have to rent ground transportation if I flew. Another was that I would have to pay for an extra three hours of plane rental if I stayed a full second day, and that made it kinda pricey.

A Dirty Job   (7/19/02)
The Lovely Linda says there are two reasons for men -- to lift heavy things and kill things like insects, spiders, small rodents and venomous reptiles. My assignments -- they're just suggestions, of course -- are delivered as she is all dressed up and ready to go to the office. Usually they involve working in the garden, which as physical assignments go is certainly not the worst. And the results are so delightfully apparent.

Unacceptable Forecast   (7/18/02)
There are enough challenges in this world to have to think our planes, bridges, and apartment buildings may be a target for lunatics. It's not right, it's not healthy, it's not acceptable. What we need to shift this scenario is to elect leaders who think differently from the crop of well-heeled, constantly-protected neoliths who are running the country, and most of the rest of the world.

The $100K Cap   (7/17/02)
I propose that no public official receive more than $100,000 a year, together with whatever reasonable costs are associated with the work. What, screameth thou, we won't be able to attract the top business people! Yeah, like we've been taking the cream off the top all this time? Horsehockey.

Volume by Volition   (7/16/02)
But it's not okay, because being hugely overweight is more than a personal issue. We aren't at a stage where food is so scarce we have to mete out equal shares, but with the burgeoning population and expanding waistlines, we may get there. And we are already paying through our health insurance premiums.

Economic Oops   (7/15/02)
All of these situations could be cleaned up, and it would be neither complicated nor time-consuming. But there is no will for that way. Not until the American public wakes up to the crimes of their electees and replaces them with honest representatives will our country have a chance of regaining control of our ship of state and sailing it out of these grossly-polluted and troubled waters.

Son of Sam  (7/12/02)
Being the news junkie I still am, and then still young, I got dressed and was out on the street flagging a cab in a few minutes. With a $20 bill in his hand, the cabbie raced down the East River Drive, depositing me at police HQ only minutes before the police arrived with David Berkowitz. I watched them lead him into the building through the front door, recording as many details as I could so that I could at least file a radio report.

Two Flippin' Hot (2)  (7/11a/02)
It was hot enough here at Casa Linda for me to think about turn the wall a/c up from its perpetually low setting. That would have entailed climbing on my chair and the bookcase, so instead I went into the house where the thermostat was set at a warmish but cooler 86, and I read silently to Buster.

Three Crimes  (7/11/02)
They were 23-year-old twins, name of Joshua and Caleb. Those names are suggestive. In this case, indicative. Joshua is a Baptist pastor and does a separate -- but we presume equal -- thang for the Spanish audience at The Capital City Baptist Church, where his father pastorizes the honkies. Caleb just kinda helps out where he can. It gets worse.

Bits & Pieces  (7/10/02)
Said one juror, in a very American way of viewing authority, "I got on my knees and prayed to God to stop me if this is the wrong thing. I've never done anything like this. Going against the FBI is a big deal. I wanted to be sure." The jury found for the plaintiffs, claiming our trusted federal and local police authorities had acted outrageously deceitful.

Consumerism  (7/09/02)
Wouldn't you think that a company that puts shaving cream in cans could do so without leaving rust rings around the bathroom? Or am I the only one who thinks he shouldn't be required to dry the can of shaving cream before putting it down? None of this is major, of course, but you have to wonder about the integrity of a company when it can't sweat the small stuff before delivering it to the consumer.

Declaring Our Interdependence  (7/08/02)
It's an extraordinary document, in both words and ideas. It recognizes that most people are willing to put up with bad government longer than they should. That the people have not only a right, but a duty, to throw off corrupted shackles and establish a good government.

Capital Corruption   (7/05/02)
Walters closed his piece with "Unless something miraculous occurs in the economy, either Davis or his successor and the Legislature would face another $9 billion to $10 billion problem -- at least -- next year, with many fewer options for quick fixes. We don't tolerate such irresponsibility from Enron or WorldCom. Why are we doing it here?"

Items   (7/04/02)
Swiss air traffic control looks like the culprit in the disastrous mid-air collision seven miles above Lake Constance in Southern Germany. Somehow the Swiss controller didn't convey to the two pilots that there were heading for each other. Even with only fifty seconds, there was plenty of time for the pilots to take evasive action, if they'd been properly directed.

Straighten Up, Tree    (7/03/02)
It was a small spike with a sorta rounded end and a pointy one. You clubbed the spike into the ground with the pointy end up and then yanked. The pointy end would catch the earth and turn sideways, solidifying its position. How do you get the thingy into the ground? With a DS 40 Drive Rod, a separate item not sold with the thingy.

Bits & Pieces    (7/02/02)
The shares of the Martha Stewart media empire are also in free-fall, what with the revelations in the Wall Street Journal that the investigation of her for possible insider trading in Imclone stock is turning up additional nasty implications that could possibly send the doyen of do-nicely to the pokey. Apparently success in everything she did professionally wasn't enough for her; enough would never be enough.

Surviving the Bought Bush  (7/01/02)
It's not that George W. Bush is a Republican or even a conservative that is the problem. The problem is that he is not an honest man. He lacks substance; he demonstrates remarkably little character. He serves himself up as little more than a mouthpiece, a talking hood ornament, for the greedy, narrow-minded business interests who got him where he is and programs him today. Charlie McCarthy had more depth, and more purpose.

Sex, Drugs 'n Sports  (6/28/02)
In the program, students are informed about teen pregnancy, disease, and how to prevent it. It stresses abstinence, but also shows how to use a condom. The parents said sex -- apparently even knowing about it -- was against their religion and sued. The district caved when they should have upheld their obligation to educate all children, despite the social and intellectual incompetence of the parents.

I Pledge Allegiance...  (6/27/02)
Most everyone misspelled the A-word, but his point was less the spelling and more to illuminate our tendency to recite the pledge without ever thinking about the words. It's not that the words or the concept are complex, but most of us had learned to recite it without ever thinking about its meaning.

Too Flippin' Hot  (6/26/02)
The fall can be decent and the spring downright pleasant; but isn't that true almost everywhere? Then along comes the summer, like clock-work you might say, and it would be better to be elsewhere. With the mercury looking for 105 and it's still June, this area with its hard rocky earth -- absent of rain for five months or more -- is a taste to hell.

Bits & Pieces  (6/25/02)
Got an email about a band of CEOnistas on the run. From Rooters, the report said, "Unwilling to wait for their eventual indictments, the 10,000 remaining CEOs of public U.S. companies made a break for it yesterday, heading for the Mexican border, plundering towns and villages along the way, and writing the entire rampage off as a marketing expense."

Snake-Bit  (6/24/02)
Back in 1927 or so in Mill Valley, there was a major fire on Mount Tamalpais. People visiting the mountain summit were evacuated by a tramway which road tracks down to the valley. The fire drove the rattlesnakes out of the woods onto the trackbed, so many in fact that the driver had to throw sand on the tracks for traction so the brakes would work.

Items  (6/21/02)
While some old guard felt that if-we-can-do-it-they-can and others viewed the sleepless schedules as good tempering of the spirit, the fact is that a lotta errors were being made due to lack of sleep that bordered on abuse. We're talking heal-thyself-physicians, after all; people who are taught to think for themselves, and not jarhead Marines who are just supposed to follow orders.

Put Riyadh on Notice  (6/20/02)
Have I gone mad, endorsing the eradication of huge numbers of marginally-complicit human beings? Perhaps. But why not hold those responsible guilty? My right-wing pals agreed with me. Which gives me pause. Maybe I've gone so far around the bend that I've come out the other side. I'll wait to hear how my lefty pals respond.

Little Girl Lies   (6/19/02)
Don't believe everything you read, including in this space, unless you're getting purely personal reflections, and even then be suspicious. But certainly don't buy into what you see on television or read in the paper or on the Net. And I'm not just talkin' about stories coming from government or corporate flacks.

Sad Francisco   (6/18/02)
Rather than deal with these people effectively, the stupes just sigh and smile haplessly and let them do their thing. The result is that the quality of life in the city degrades. The stench of urine on some streets is overwhelming. People lie asleep or drunk or dead on the sidewalks. Others aggressively approach passersby, demanding money, sometimes assaulting them.

The Courting Life (6/17/02)
Not making it to court, a 36-year-old suspect in the murders of at least ten women hanged himself in the St. Louis County jail, despite being on a suicide watch that called for guards to check on him every 15 minutes. "We do everything we can to prevent this kind of thing," said a jail official, who probably didn't major in English, or in deep thinking.

Quartet  (6/14/02)
Congress screwed up, again, passing the bill with as little attention as there was fervor. There are likely many other errors in the bill, and they should be fixed if we're not to have to free some terrorists on a technicality. At least The Shoe-Bomber will still face life in prison if convicted on the other eight charges against him.

Drums Along the Bushwa  (6/13/02)
Every time the man opens his mouth we get further proof that he probably doesn't register what he is saying. Certainly he doesn't seem hamstrung by memory. Or maybe he remembers changing positions time and time again, but his handlers tell him it doesn't matter...because The American People will always stand behind their commander-'n-chief in time of war.

Statistically Sputtering  (6/12/02)
The chief economist at Wells Fargo said last month: "The economy is rebounding and we are likely to see surprises on the upside rather than on the downside." This is cheerleading, folks; propaganda to the troops -- you and me -- not to worry. We should keep our money in the market -- nay, put more in -- if only to do our small part for thewaronterrorism. It was only last year that Kenneth Lay was telling his Enron employees that everything was fine when it certainly wasn't.

Sealed Without a Kiss  (6/11/02)
With back-to-school and then the Halloween seasons approaching, investors started dumping Hershey stock. These are peak sales periods for chocolate producers, and Hershey was operating at 20% below capacity due to a five-week strike at two plants. So Hershey said enough's enough and restarted the two plants with non-union labor. And even though the two sides figured out a satisfactory contract a few days later, the collapse of negotiations augurs ill for many companies, and their workers.

Items  (6/10/02)
Surely one can empathize with all of the horrific experiences of their losses, but doesn't anyone grieve privately anymore? I tend to think that people who live their pain in public, and for years on end, are milking their victimhood. Like the families of the Lockerbie bombing. Get on with your own lives or don't, but sharing time is over.

Bits & Pieces    (6/07/02)
Irony of ironies, the man was not charged with the usual interfering with a flight crew because the plane was not American, wasn't headed to our country, and we didn't have such authority. However, he did have a packet of cocaine in his pocket, and now faces 20 years. There was no explanation of why they kept serving drinks to the 38-year-old passenger.

Degrees of Ignorance  (6/06/02)
High school students in Palm Beach County -- Florida home of the notorious butterfly ballot -- can pass a new history final exam by answering correctly only 23 of 100 multiple choice questions. Getting half right will earn an A and 39 right get a B. Presuming that there are four answers to choose from, this means that simply answering every question with the same letter would statistically give them an excellent chance of passing the test.

Fire for Cause  (6/05/02)
I certainly have faith in the majority of firemen. Most are brave beyond imagination. They work hard, saving lives, preventing greater damage, often with their lives on the line. But there is a shadow to some of these people, and probably in numbers larger than the general population, that cocks an eyebrow from time to time.

Take It All Off, Mommy  (6/04/02)
The mother, who because of the publicity was hired by a local radio station and had numerous other job offers, said of the spread-spread, "Before all of this happened I was extremely interested in posing. I have the utmost respect for the entire company, and I believe posing for Playboy is the American dream for a woman."

Governor Buck$-aroo    (6/03/02)
The trouble is, he's been such a disaster for the state of California, making myriad wrong decisions that will be damaging for years -- even decades -- to come, but because he's up against a remarkably worse candidate, he's likely to get re-elected in November.

Bits & Pieces    (5/31/02)
If there is a solution to the insanity of the Kashmir, it is likely post-war. Pakistan's leader would like to get rid of the Muslim radicals that make governing his country so precarious, but he knows they would go after him if he went after them. India knows this, so why they are pushing against Musharref so arduously makes people think the gray-hairs of the land of Gandhi want war.

Here Come Duh Flood   (5/30/02)
My image, ala Indiana Jones, is of an ancient sewer conduit filled with rats, racing past and climbing over each other, trying to get ahead of the approaching wall of water. Only in our case, we're talking about a polyglot parade of self-interest groups who have commandeered the gravy train and are heading for disaster.

Reapin' 'n Sowin'   (5/29/02)
The stuff that issues from the spin doctors in Washington bears a striking resemblance to standard television fare, and the concomitant hype. The most wonderfulest, heart-warmingest, strugglingest god-blessed American people -- well, what more can we say. Is it prime time or is it the White House? Who can tell anymore?

Items   (5/28/02)
Rather included himself in the charge when he said newspeople were afraid to challenge the Bushies. "It is an obscene comparison...but you know there was a time in South Africa that people would put flaming tyres around people's necks if they dissented. And in some ways the fear is that you will be necklaced here, you will have a flaming tyre of lack of patriotism put around your neck....I worry that patriotism run amok will trample the very values that the country seeks to defend."

People in the News   (5/27/02)
Rita Wilson should have kept her hands to herself. She also should have kept her mouth shut. On administrative leave while schools administrators bowing to parent pressure investigate the Rancho Bernardo High School Vice Principal, Ms. Wilson broke her silence and spoke with a local television station. "This was a safety issue," claims Wilson, who reportedly lifted the skirts of young women to make sure that they weren't wearing thong underwear to a school dance.

Bits & Pieces   (5/24/02)
Davis had a bunch of teachers union leaders in his capitol office, and allegedly said outright, "I need $1 million from you guys." Respondeth the chief union thug said, head-shakingly out loud, "I want to know who's been taking our money for years, saying they support our issues and then voting against us. We need to hold these people accountable."

Fluffernutter   (5/23/02)
It's easier to fill your head with fluff in place of news, especially if you don't care enough about our country to pay attention, or if you're stupid or lazy. If you did care, you'd realize that in our society — with a government of and by as well as for the people — there's something ugly, and almost treasonous, about not being properly informed.

Committed to Failure   (5/22/02)
Director Mueller announced that he believes that it is inevitable that suicide bombers detonate in our midst. Inevitable? Then Homeland Security Director Ridge said new terrorist attacks are not a matter of if but when. And Chief Militarist Rumsfeld said it's only a matter of time before terrorists get their hands on nukes. That's not leadership it's a commitment to failure.

Slithering    (5/21/02)
Lots of sizzle and little steak is Dinotopia, the ABC three-night six-hour "mega-series" about two yutes who crash land in prehistoric times. According to the promo, The New York Times called it "Jurassic Park meets The Wizard of Oz" but this piece of banality doesn't have a whisper of quality to it. Four-year-old grandson Jonah, who's been into dinosaurs for half his life, found the show boring. Musta been written for reptile brains.

The Worst of Murder    (5/20/02)
Nine years ago, when I lived outside of Chicago, I read the following lead line in a Chicago Tribune story about the discovery of a mass murder in a nearby town. "It snowed Sunday in Palatine. All the rest is speculation." That lead has stayed with me over the years because all this time, the police had been unable to find the men who shot to death seven employees of a Brown's Chicken outlet.

Rid Us of the Deceivers    (5/17/02)
Scurrilously taking advantage of our horror and angst, they rallied the nation behind their pseudo-patriotic straitjacket leadership. They took our hearts, our minds, and our money under false pretense. Such deception is despicable and warrants a thorough investigation into their process of failure and cover-up. It may demand an impeachment inquiry.

Behind the Headlines  (5/16/02)
The problems at the FBI are endemic and deep. New units won't help, unless they fire the people who were making the decisions a year ago. Same with the CIA. How can George Tenet keep his job? Why aren't the top 100 people in Langley in jail for malfeasance that borders on treason? Not only didn't they warn us before the deadly assaults, but they've missed the boat on intelligence for the past fifteen years.

Flying Is Learning  (5/15/02)
One lesson in this flight was a favorite: stay ahead of the plane. I let my attention wander to the considerable traffic — on the radio and in the skies — and let the plane get ahead of me. My landing, which was more like a stone skipping over water, was not rough but thoroughly inelegant. Linda kindly noted that she had suffered worse.

Bits & Pieces    (5/14/02)
The concern of the AFA is that it doesn't do them or the passengers any good if you arm the cockpit crew but keep 'em behind a fortified door. The pilots association says the cabin crew should remain disarmed. And try to keep everyone calm if they hear gunshots coming from the flight deck.

Standing Against Reason    (5/13/02)
It's one thing to be anti-choice, but to actively oppose health clinics and neo-natal programs because you think someone might terminate a pregnancy is mindlessness from the dark ages. Not only should these perverted old white men not have a say in the reproductive lives of women around the globe, but they should be encouraging the use of birth control as effectively as possible so that we're not over-run by hunger-crazed foreigners who will walk, swim, and die to get food for their children.

Tactical Alternatives   (5/10/02)
There is an alternative military approach, and you have to wonder sometimes why Israel hasn't tried it sooner. That is to wipe out Arafat and his 10,000 most ardent supporters. Something of a scorched burnoose policy. It would have to be swift and lethal, and the Israelis would need to couch it as tactical rather than punitive, convincing or not. But that's only step one.

Miscellany   (5/09/02)
Dowd frequently sends me to the dictionary to look up words like schadenfreude and batrachian. The former means "taking pleasure in the misfortunes of others" which she was at the expense of assorted scoundrels in a recent column, and the latter means "of or relating to vertebrate amphibians without tails, such as frogs and toads", and, as she applied it, to Enron executives who seem to have manipulated energy supplies at the expense of The Golden State.

Decapitated Headlines   (5/08/02)
The Schwartzentruber Amish don't want to put reflectors on the backs of their buggies and farm equipment, some of which become serious road hazards, traveling the highways at five miles per hour. The Amish resist, saying the red safety triangles represent faith in man-made symbols instead of god. True to embarrass-able form, the ACLU is backing them on the grounds of religious freedom. Such dim bulbs can't be seen, even at night.

Circle to Land  (5/07/02)
We condemn millions of young children to malnourishment during the critical first years of life when their brains are supposed to grow, and it's a failure that can be repaired later. They will survive, most of them, to age but not to grow into self-sustaining adults; however they will still be able to bear young, although their progeny will have a good chance of being limited or deformed.

Reasons to Persevere  (5/06/02)
We condemn millions of young children to malnourishment during the critical first years of life when their brains are supposed to grow, and it's a failure that can be repaired later. They will survive, most of them, to age but not to grow into self-sustaining adults; however they will still be able to bear young, although their progeny will have a good chance of being limited or deformed.

Justice Without Vengeance   (5/03/02)
White collar criminals get a deuce in a "country club" while we put a teen pot-sellers in prison for a decade with mother-stabbers and father-rapers. We continue to incarcerate more than any other society on the planet, with a recidivism rate of nearly 80%. Imagine what the people who get out have learned that they didn't know when they went in. But instead of fixing the criminal justice system, we just build more prisons.

The American Catholic Church   (5/02/02)
In truth, the pope had little to do with the statements that have been made in his name. They were determined and written by the coterie of courtesans who have managed the ideology of the church for a long, long time. They're kinda like the staffers in government who survive the politicians and keep the ball rolling, slowly. We can only guess how long it's been since the pope actually thought anything on his own.

The Passing Parade   (5/01/02)
The PETA folks are trying to stop a California dairy group from advertising that "Great cheese comes from happy cows. Happy cows come from California" The ads are kinda funny, but PETA says the conditions under which the cows actually live are not, and they want the FTC to pull the ads. How crazy is it to be concerned about people buying cheese because they hear cows joking on television?


An Affirmative Vote   (4/30/02)
We appear to have a choice between the tax-'n-spend liberals who want to give away the store and then some to every crackhead and gay baby whale — that's the way the mainstream up here sees it — and the rock-ribbed conservatives who think that we should pull the plug on government entirely.

A Busy World   (4/29/02)
You may have wondered why I posted audio versions for all of the SetonnoteS last week, since my audio-fying has been kinda sporadic. It's because a mucky-muck from NPR is coming to town today — here to raise funds for the local station — and I wanted to get warmed up for him. I'm gonna give him a CD to take back East which will tell him why he wants to put me on his radio network.

If You Call Right Now...   (4/26/02)
Television is where advertising hits the bottom. The worst spots look like they were produced for Saturday Night Live. One recently featured a belt you fix around your stomach and turn it on and you lose gazillions of pounds before you can say "ripped off again." The hostess tells us that this belt used to cost $120 and seems to imply that it sold out at that price. But wait, they've made a special deal with the factory for you, and you can have it for only $20.

Items   (4/25/02)
The Hawaiian Humane Society has spent $50,000 so far trying to rescue a dog from an abandoned oil tanker. Forgea, a two-year-old mutt was left on board when the ship was abandoned April 2^nd after a fire. Though well fed, the dog won't seem to let her would be rescuers get close enough to capture her.

Sunday Morning Skies   (4/24/02)
Not having flown with so many people before — even though Connor is small — I ask Trent his weight. And Linda, too, 'cause we'd had a real fine dinner the night before. All added up, it turned out we were well within weight limits, despite the second helping of Linda's delicious from-scratch German chocolate cake.

Bush Needs Another War   (4/23/02)
They are prepared to see a million more Americans become homeless. They continue to try and sell the magnificent vistas of our nation to oil drillers. They are giving the military more than they even ask for, while they have converted grudging respect for our country into embarrassed concern in virtually every capital in the world.

Bits & Pieces   (4/22/02)
They're supposed to be funny. Some Asian-American groups didn't find them so, and demanded reparations so vociferously that it wasn't clear what would work for them. Said A-'n-F exec, announcing that they were pulling the shirts off the shelves, "We're very, very, very sorry. It's never been our intention to offend anyone." Hey, if you say "very" three times, that should be enough, right?

Bits & Pieces  (4/19/02)
In yet another demonstration of their loosey-goosey notion of journalistic integrity, CNN says it's all right with them if Lou Dobbs moonlights for some of the companies he covers in his business reports. At issue is Dobbs voicing radio commercials for various firms, though he didn't use his name or make a formal endorsement. Said a CNN spokesgeek, "It's standard procedure in radio. Howard Stern does it."

The Spirit Light  (4/18/02)
There is no ground or floor below; no sky above. The beam is in the middle of a beautiful bright white-yellow light realm; not glaring, but bright, and soft in a way that I don't have to squint. I can see stars or sparkles of some sort, golden and white, twinkling all about. And there are rainbows flowing through in the distant background.

Meshugaas  (4/17/02)
By the close of business, the chance of winning will be around 80,000,000 to one. Said one parrot of flawless if meaningless logic, you can't win if you don't buy a ticket. Kinda scary to see all those people lining up lemming-like to plunk down their hard-earned on such silliness, but maybe it's not so bad. Maybe people don't really think they have a chance, they just want to be part of something loud.

Bits & Pieces  (4/16/02)
When this past winter West and others threatened to bolt to Princeton, Summers supplicated when he should have instead handed them a map. One left already, though he said it was not related to West's sturm und drang and now the chief sleaze is headed to New Jersey himself. Princeton will soon discover what Summers knew but didn't have the cohones to resist.

Getting Their Due  (4/15/02)
Justice is not always denied; delayed as it all too often is. Eventually, in many cases, the bad guy finds himself in court holding onto a slack rope. And that's as it should be. More black hats should fall, and faster, too, since not only are wrongs not righted in a timely fashion, but more people are wronged as the dramas of investigation and prosecution stumble along, lagging the proverbial tortoise.

Floor Models  (4/12/02)
There are a lotta folks out there who think that they can do certain kinds of work because it seems so easy. Or they're not up to greater challenges. Like waiting tables or providing housekeeping service. Not that there aren't stars in either area, who shine ever more brightly in comparison with the standard issue, who seem remarkably inept at jobs that one might expect even unskilled people should be able to pick up with a little focus, a smattering of purpose, and a daub of natural intelligence. No more expectations.

Items  (4/11/02)
The latest government-sponsored report on college drinking, while horrific, should be of no surprise, since the advertising is targeting teens who want to grow up the wrong way. The report says that 1,400 college students are killed each year due to alcohol, and that doesn't even include, for some reason, homicides or suicides. Alcohol also contributes to 500,000 injuries and 70,000 cases of sexual assault or date rape. Another 400,000 students 18-to-24 admitted having unprotected sex because they were inebriated.

Dumber and Dumbest  (4/10/02)
Federal staffers allegedly protecting the Stanislaus National Forest wrote memos on how to deal with the California agency dealing with off-road vehicles. One said "Take the money and run" and another called for the feds to "Fake it!" suggesting that they apply for state funds, and if they don't like what happens, then to pull out of talks with the state. It's bad enough to think that way, but when you put it in a memo, it may cross the line from stupid to criminal.

Cardinal Sin  (4/09/02)
This story would most likely have been investigated properly, before being reported, were it not for the current slosh of charges, confessions, and payoffs regarding priestly misconduct. One good look at this woman's history and statements would have spiked the copy before it made it into print. The local rag printed a wire version that contained none of the woman's quotes or circumstances, leaving the cardinal to twist slowly, slowly in the wind with its readers.

Right 'n Might  (4/08/02)
If it is true what Donald Rumsfeld says, and that's always iffy at best, that Saddam Hussein has been offering to pay families of suicide bombers for their loss, then I'm climbin' over the fence. Earlier in the week, Rumsfeld said it was a $10,000 payment, and now he's saying that was raised to $25,000. In Palestinian quarters that's some serious bread, and it's enough to attract outsiders.

When Life Aligns  (4/05/02)
The meeting the next morning went well, with Linda having an even better time as she plied the aisles of the local Trader Joe's, an establishment that is deeply missed by the quality-conscious of the North State. Knowing that the Skyhawk could only carry a few hundred extra pounds of cargo, my darling wife — mindful of the importance of safe flying — limited her selection wisely. We drove onto the tarmac and unloaded the car onto the plane, and then returned the car.

The Big "C" Church  (4/04/02)
My deep-thinking pal Yo walks the Maine beaches to clear his head, but there ain't no amount of walking, he says, to understand why those who control the Catholic Church have not acted toward reform. The only reason why the Catholic Church continues as an institution, he suggests, is because of the early brainwashing. If people weren't exposed to religion until they were old enough to question, many fewer would follow the path of the church.

"And Everybody Hates the Jews"  (4/03/02)
Thomas Friedman said in a New York Times column, "Mr. Arafat is not interested in the content of a Palestinian state, only the contours." And there are times when Sharon makes Arafat look good, even though the Israelis seem to be limiting their strikes to military objectives while the Arabs are going after civilians.

Bits & Pieces  (4/02/02)
Take this news item out of Mecca, actually reported by finally-horrified Saudi newspapers, about how the religious police let 15 little girls die in a school blaze. Apparently the police, otherwise known as the Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice, prevented men from trying to rescue the girls or open the school gates, because the girls weren't wearing head scarves and robes.

Love Ya, Princess  (4/01/02)
Serious love, quality love, is a dance of whole beings. Like a magnifying glass capturing the suns rays to set fire to a leaf, the conscious person aligns himself with the mighty power of the universe, and delivers his all, gracefully, with purpose, in every breath. And is rewarded with a life partner like The Lovely Linda.

Where Went Spring?  (3/29/02)
We started this week with highs in the fifties, maybe creeping into the sixties in a dull moment, and by the end of the week the mercury was climbing record-wise in the direction of ninety. This should be no surprise, since the weather is the weather, and no one has it figured out, or at least no one who's talking. This fact is underscored by those who do talk as though they knew something about it.

Triage at the Front  (3/28/02)
What's different over the past few years? For one thing, she and her staff are now writing up their evaluations of prospective clients and choosing to take people in on the basis of those forms, whereas before they used to go on gut feelings. They don't know if that more legalistic/bureaucratic approach might be related or not to the worsening conditions. Mickey said they need to take a look at that.

Items  (3/27/02)
Maybe the good employees should bolt, too, and form a new firm, if they were so wonderful and in no way related to the bad apples. Hey, all I did was fiddle; I didn't set the fires. Okay, some good people are going to lose out, but too many people in that firm got obscenely rich advising corporations to hide revenues, legally and otherwise, and to avoid paying their fair share of taxes.

Blind and Lame  (3/26/02)
Truth be told, I wasn't surprised. In this town, small minds prevail at every level, and I wasn't going to educate these cheap tricks to the higher standards of journalism. They were too tightly wrapped in their homespun parochial pettiness to begin to understand the importance of the truth before judgment, fact before opinion.

Bits & Pieces  (3/25/02)
Don't cry for the now ex-Razorbacker; he's getting $500,000 a year for the next six years. That's half of what he would have gotten for coaching. No wonder people can go to college and come out stupid, when the schools spend so much energy and money on a flippin' sports coach, who may, by the way, sue them on the basis of some ill-perceived discrimination issued. Shame on them all.

Marvy Marin Morning  (3/22/02)
Wherever one lives there is a trade off, as in the cuckoos in San Francisco and the narrow little minds in Redding, versus the revivifying Bay environment and the glorious mountain-ringed vistas of the northern end of the Sacramento Valley. But at core, I truly believe that the ocean plays an important part in how people congregate and socialize. Perhaps it is the wave-splashed negative ions in the lower atmosphere, or the laving of the tides. Versus the unyielding hard-scrabble unconsciousness up the road.

The Larger Reality (woof, woof)  (3/21/02)
Which is why we are where we are today, with an over-abundance of schlock and incompetence, and few people seeming to care, if they can tell the difference. I haven't a doubt in the world but that They — the general public — would know quality if they saw it, only they haven't been exposed to much recently. Watch the idiot box, and you'll see commercials that don't make sense, or if they're simple enough to understand, the audio is out of synch or the pictures don't match the copy.

Reforming the Medical Industry  (3/20/02)
You’d maybe think that the son and brother and brother-in-law of doctors — also, my uncle was a dentist — would be at least sanguine about modern medicine, but you’d be wrong. I tend to side with Bones in the Star Trek IV movie when he glimpses 20th Century medicine and is shocked at its primitivity.

...For the People  (3/19/02)
People at the federal trough should be hired on the basis of ability, not longevity. They should be screened for an attitude conducive to public service, and trained to seek out solutions instead of hiding behind arcane rules. Similarly the government should hold its contractors to the highest standards, and not squander our precious tax dollars on corrupt businesses.

Bits & Pieces  (3/18/02)
Reminds me of a report that was sat upon almost as quickly as it surfaced, when the U.S. invaded Grenada in 1983. Ostensibly the invasion was to rescue a group of American medical students, but really it was about tweaking Castro. Which explains why officials on the "rescue" flights back told the med students that they were going to be billed for the ride home. True story. Of course, the bosses quickly recanted and said some bureaucrat had it wrong.

The Ice Maiden  (3/15/02)
I resist calling Sarah Hughes a woman. While she has the elegance of a fine lady, she still glows with a lovely naif quality that might only be ascribed to a maiden. If you didn't know, she is the figure skater who last month delivered one of the grandest performances on ice since Jayne Torvill and Christopher Dean defined the art in Sarajevo in 1984. Beyond the skating, the sixteen-year-old illuminated the magnificence of the human spirit.

Monterey Weekend  (3/14/02)
When we got to our motel, we checked in and got back into the car for a short drive to Monastery Beach. There we parked and walked the beach to the Carmel River, which somewhat half-heartedly, but appropriately for the end of the winter season, still cuts a stream to the Pacific. We saw many anemone and a starfish in the tidal pools. And we breathed in the delicious and mild sea air, bouquet'd with the light sweetness of alyssum.

Put 'Em Up  (3/13/02)
As the woman walked home, Morgan drove up and more words were exchanged. According to Morgan's lawyer, the customer swore and spat and then lunged at her. The police say Morgan pulled the customer's hair, knocked her to the ground, and kicked her in the head. Or as the victim put it, "she commenced a whooping on me."

Bits & Pieces  (3/12/02)
Amy Fisher was punched out by the New York parole board which took a dim view of Joey Buttafuoco's slut-shooter getting into a fight on TV with Tonya Harding. Among other reasons, the state said it "would send an inappropriate message to victims of violent crime." So Tonya, who tried to cripple her competition with a crowbar-by-proxy, gets to trade blows with Paula Jones, whose blows nearly brought down the Cheeser of the Free World. Maybe they'll get Hillary to call the play-boy-play.

Ft. Worthless Wile  (3/11/02)
The woman and some friends then dumped the body in a local park. The body was discovered, and it was determined that he was the victim of a hit and run, though they couldn't figure out how the body got to its hiding place. The driver pulled out the seats of the car and tried to burn them in her backyard. She was planning to torch the rest of the car and buy a new one; she said she was just waiting for her tax refund.

Politics Is Personal   (3/08/02)
Because he announced late, his campaign was launched late, and with all the finesse of a marinated teenager. He then listened to the wrong people, took bad advice, and again for too long. In his defense it might be said there wasn't much margin for error, but he cruised right through the margin and beyond.

Flag 'Em Down  (3/07/02)
The yacht owners are not asking that the flag be returned, but they want the firefighters to sign affidavits attesting to their having purloined it. They will use the documents to substantiate their claim of a tax deduction for donating the flag to The City. Said the wife, "We just want to make sure the flag is used appropriately, and not as a crass marketing tool. If they use it appropriately, we'd want to donate it. If not, we want it back."

Hairport Sekurity    (3/06/02)
It's probably unfair to snipe at the airport screeners, more than occasionally because they make such an easy target. Kinda like a metal detector going off 'cause someone was carrying a three-foot machete in his belt. But over the past week or so hundreds of flights and tens of thousands of passengers have been delayed because someone neglected to plug in the magnetometers at airports in Los Angeles, Boston, and Buffalo, to name a few.

Bits & Pieces   (3/05/02)
Said Graham, "A lot of Jews are great friends of mine. They swarm around me and are friendly to me. Because they know that I am friendly to Israel and so forth. But they don't know how I really feel about what they're doing to this country, and I have no power and no way to handle them." Responded Nixon, "You must not let them know."

God's Angry Flocks   (3/04/02)
Not letting facts stand in the way of opinion, an overwhelming majority of Muslims worldwide don't accept that Arabs staged the September attacks. Indeed, only 18% buy our view, and most of the rest think it was the U.S. and Israel. Not wishing to sound harsh, but when people refuse to accept evidence the rest of the world does, then maybe we need to take another look at who's out there and where they get their information.

To Tell You the Truth...   (3/01/02)
Punch-drunk with the post-September blank check for the waragainstterrorism, they had created the Office of Strategic Information. It was organized to feed disinformation to foreign journalists. Well, apparently the envelope got over-pushed. Word got out that they were officially gonna lie, albeit to the foreign press, and that kinda rankled some folks who thought aloud, What's next...lying domestically?

Items   (2/28/02)
Tille Tooter was trapped in her Toyota Tercel for three days two years ago when a young Florida man in a Camaro hit her from behind and pushed her over the edge of a highway embankment where she landed in a thick mangrove swamp where the foliage cushioned her fall but then hid her from rescue until a teen trashpicker spotted her wreck.

Miscellany   (2/27/02)
A dear friend, when she was a trusting Catholic girl of ten, was pulled into a closet and briefly felt up by a pervert-of-the-cloth until she escaped. People who molest children transgress basic human decency; there is no other cheek to turn. And the institution which has protected them for decades should be abandoned by its parishioners until they can find decent people to run it.

Peace or Death   (2/26/02)
If there were a finite target — even a huge one — it might make sense for Israel to use force, but the fatal bloodlust is instilled in the Palestinian young; remember the children chanting anti-American slogans last fall. They didn't know what they were celebrating; they will inculcate the politics of blind hatred as they grow up, and blow themselves up in a mall.

Bits & Pieces  (2/25/02)
It looks like the folks in Minniesoda have stopped laughing and clapping themselves on the back, now that they've belatedly discovered that Jesse Ventura as governor is about as real as the wrestling from whence he came. Ventura won as an independent crypto-reformist when the voters split on the two "real" if unappealing candidates three years ago.

Excite the Passion  (2/22/02)
An old spook pal-'o-mine bemoans with deepening despair the blatant insanity of the violence in the Middle East. He wonders how so many young Palestinian men could be so driven to blow themselves up, along with a score of contemporaries whose only apparent crime is shopping or eating pizza or riding on a bus. He also rues what he views as the observe of social involvement — the flat-line here in the Redding community.

The Big O  (2/21/02)
Since I clacked productively this weekend, writing scripts and things, and I cleared some brush from the hillside, I felt myself worthy of some relaxation before the idiot box. There being little to watch, as there rarely is anyway, I turned on the Olympics coverage. Which is a scaled preface; that is to say, I am a casual, not causal observer.

Just the Headlines  (2/20/02)
If drowning your five children in the bathtub isn't insane, what is? What is achieved by trying her? Who benefits from her being found guilty and sentenced to death? I mean, if you really want her to suffer, don't cut that suffering short. Maybe he's hunting the headlines. He brought out the clothing that the children were wearing when they were drowned, so show their size. Who's crazy now?

Quixote with Humor  (2/19/02)
The fellow who caught the wrath was something of a fruit loop anyway, and deserved the opprobrium, even as he was the victim of mistaken identity. He and his wife were zealous — beyond the pale — supporters of Jerry Brown's presidential bid, and thought they knew everything about politics. They later attempted a palace coup to replace me. But they failed because they didn't understand that Barry wasn't the typical politician; he valued our friendship over anything they might have offered, even if they were right and not kooky.

Bits & Pieces  (2/18/02)
NPR led their morning news last Thursday with the Olympics, reporting unnecessarily on the busy day ahead. They neglected to mention the top breaking story of the day, that the House of Representatives — righteous dudes, as they would like to see themselves, at least occasionally — voted by a substantial margin of 240 to 189 for the most significant campaign finance reform legislation since Watergate, or so it's being billed.

Poli-Telemarketers  (2/15/02)
Suppose I corrected her incorrectly? Say I said "a" billion instead of her "twelve"? That could cause some problems. If some subsequent callees didn't have the facts and gave her other numbers or "corrected" other "facts," ya gotta think the message at the end of the day would sound like the gossip game run through a drunk tank.

Home Unsophisticated Home  (2/14/02)
This morning on our walk, Buster and I heard two birds talking to each other from trees apart. You could tell they were communicating, as there was a lot of repetition, one of the other. I haven’t a clue what they were discussing, but there was particularly liberated quality to their warbling. They weren’t sharing train schedules.

CA Gov at-a-glance  (2/13/02)
Unless Riordan slips badly, he should win as Simon and Jones split the conservative ballots. Then we'll have eight months of Gray Davis draining the $35+ million he's already war-chested. For most of the three years he's been Governor, Davis has spent his days waxing gubernatorial doing photo ops, and his evenings passing the collection plate at mega-bucks fundraisers.

Bits & Pieces  (2/12/02)
The judge hearing the case of the couple whose dogs slaughtered a neighbor woman has ruled that evidence cannot be presented of the sexual relationship they had with the dogs. However, he will allow the jury to hear that the couple adopted a prisoner at one of California's most fearsome prisons, a fellow-cuckoo who owned the dogs, was a member of the Aryan Brotherhood, and kept photos of his naked "mother" in his cell.

Kashmir Bouquet  (2/11/02)
      Ya know, if we had a quickie with Pakistan, we could solve a lotta problems in one swelled foop.
      (Did I mention that they'd been drinking for a while?)
      Tell us more, about your war.
      Okay, first of all, we wipe out a bunch of those Hindus who have been stirring up so much trouble for us.
      Don't you mean Muslims? (This was asked in a snooty tone of voice by a minister of art and housing.)

"Men went mad..."  (2/08/02)
Insanity is not limited to combat. There are the millions among us who make civilian life a crapshoot. Consider how many people race trains to railroad crossings. Dunno how many tried it, but we do know a whole bunch who didn't make it. According to a fed safety board, there were 3,500 collisions between vehicles and trains in 2000, claiming 425 lives.

Pre-emptive Primaries  (2/07/02)
Back then, political conventions meant something, but they no longer do. Once they actually selected the candidates, now they simply ratify. The parties have turned them into embarrassingly-flagrant propaganda efforts that have nothing to do with leadership and everything to do with glitz. How unfortunate that the parties no longer use the conventions to spell out what they represent. Except that they don't really represent anything more than power and self-aggrandizement.

Items  (2/06/02)
Chile is plunking down $660,000,000 for ten of our F-16 military aircraft. Chilean Defense Minister Michelle Bachelet said their neighbors shouldn't worry about the new weapons, because they're just "replacing obsolete equipment." Uh-huh, say neighbors Peru and Bolivia, who are unhappy, charging that adding to the Chilean air force could "upset the military balance in the region." Like there should be any military to balance?

Foursome   (2/05/02)
The British government is considering a ban on all alcoholic beverages on all commercial aircraft. This is the result of a 50% increase in air-rage incidents over the past three years. Typical government over-reaction, and probably self-defeating, too, since most flight crews would probably rather their passengers be a little looped, as that makes them less frightened and more compliant

Keystone Screeners   (2/04/02)
The stupervisor, a step above on the ladder, but still beneath sentience, panics, and she and Romeo run around looking for the guy who likely was unaware of any problems because he didn't run away, he merely strolled along the way anyone would. After the headless chicken routine, the stupe starts informing others, though not the feds, who let depart seven planes which might have included the fellow with the traces of explosives on his shoes.

Rut-Busting 101   (2/01/02)
When you think about some of the breath-catchingly idiotic decisions that some industry leaders have made — decisions that were thankfully over-ruled — you have to wonder how much further ahead we might be now if intelligence were requisite to leadership. In government, industry, and education — and probably every other field — the potential for greatness seems to be shackled by cretins.

It's a Curious Planet   (1/31/02)
An entire SFO terminal was evacuated, along with people already on planes. Thousands of people's travel plans on dozens of planes was disrupted, because we hire people who aren't even high school graduates — and most not even citizens, talk about security — for a very simple job. And the thing is, whoever he was, the stuff could have been from old firecrackers or heart medicine. Or something more dangerous, which is why it would have been a good thing not to mislay him.

Not a Bad Girl   (1/30/02)
Hey, make a cake with the wrong ingredients or build a house on a shoddy foundation and the results are predictably negative. Which makes life heartrending for families who don’t get right the formative years. Dealing with hormonally-frenetic teenagers who lack a sound spiritual/ethical base — they are floundering in a toxic sea of television-tainted perspectives — seems a nearly insurmountable task.

Miscellany   (1/29/02)
Then there are the five bishops, as well as countless other Catholic Church officials, who did nothing about the problem of a priest named Geoghan, who molested hundreds of children over a coupla decades. They knew, they transferred him, they kept a lid on. In a deposition in a civil case against the priest and the management, a bishop was asked why he hadn't done more about charges in 1980 that the priest had abused seven boys in just one extended family. Said the church leader, "I am not a policeman; I am a shepherd."

Bits & Pieces   (1/28/02)
Representative James Maloney, D-Connecticut, is proposing a new military citation. He thinks there should be a Crimson Cross, for injuries suffered during military operations that aren't due to bullets or shrapnel. He thinks we need to recognize with a medal people who suffered from things like frostbite, malaria, Agent Orange effects, and broken bones.

Desert Waste   (1/25/02)
They are — giving them the benefit of the doubt — a step above the barbaric society of our allies in Afghanistan. A recent email described them as "They have no respect for anything, not for their families or for each other or for themselves. They claw at one another as a way of life." Take away the money, and Las Vegas might soon resemble Kandahar.

Uncle Stanley   (1/24/02)
If there are two things that mark my uncle in my mind it is that he loved to eat and he loved to laugh. Indeed, his religion had to be based on a good steak, or maybe some linguini in clam sauce, the garlic you could smell a mile away. And if he could feed himself well with people who enjoyed sharing a good time, with lots of jokes and clever stories, then he probably had everything he wanted. Without disparaging the competition, I suggest that such a religion merits serious consideration.

Term Limits Redux   (1/23/02)
The reason for term limits was to scrape a whole slew of aging barnacles from the bottom of the ship of state because the people they represented didn't have the substance and vision to replace them themselves. And ultimately, of course, it comes down to we the people. We who select, nominate, and elect. We are the ones who haven't been doing a good job. And as we have the final voice, we can't blame our hirelings — too much — for the work they have done and failed to do. Democracy simply won't succeed where the people neglect their responsibility to pick good leaders.

Bits & Pieces     (1/22/02)
Darwin has visited the Congo. If a volcano wasn't enough. About fifty people were trying to siphon off fuel from a gas station in advance of the advancing lava. They stayed too long. Boom. Like those people who were tapping into a pipeline off in the wilds a while back, and someone just had to have a cigarette.

New Friends, Old Values  (1/21/02)
We are not a healthy people if large numbers think they’re entitled to a free ride. We are doomed if people don’t educate themselves to the facts that govern our existence. What, after all, is our democratic way of life really about if we don’t understand and participate? What kind of false patriotic hoo-haw are we wallowing in when we adorn our cars with American flags but refuse to show up at the polls?

Bits & Pieces   (1/18/02)
Another screw loose in our global vision is the stationing of Afghanistan prisoners in Guantanamo. Okay, I know that we shouldn't question anything the Administration does anymore, especially when it comes to wars 'n stuff, but why transport a bunch of psychotic mercenaries to a delightful tropical setting a half-a-world away. Okay, we're not gonna just shoot 'em, 'cause that would be wrong, but why Club Med, which Cuba's gotta seem like after winter in Tora Bora?

Squeak-Squeak  (1/17/02)
I booked the Piper because it has a GPS navigation system, because forecasts threatened clouds here and there, and satellites make finding places a lot easier than the less-equipped Cessna Skyhawks that I rent. I had flown only eight hours in the Piper, but it was a plane in which I wanted to develop a feeling of comfort. We climbed to 10,000 feet and caught a 45-knot tailwind; our groundspeed registered 165.

January Thaw  (1/16/02)
We would take advantage of The Thaw, unzipping our jackets and attacking the glacial deposits in the driveway and on the sidewalk. Because a New England winter deposits snow in small to moderate amounts, compared to other places further north and not as close to the Gulf Streaming coast, but little of it seems to melt. And when it does, usually in the middle of the afternoon, it's just about the time that the sun is setting and the temperature heads back down past freezing.

The Couch Pretzel Incident  (1/15/02)
President Bush took a header into the floor when he fainted while choking on a pretzel watching a football playoff game alone in the White House residence while the First Lady was in the next room on a telephone call. Apparently he was out only for a short while, because Premier Cheney didn't have time to take over the reins of government. Mr. Bush has low blood pressure, which makes him susceptible to fainting while choking on a pretzel, and humbly speaking for the sentient of our nation, it's a good thing that the result wasn't more serious.

Major League Collapse  (1/14/02)
What's interesting is that these high-priced trash-suckers — players and greedier owners alike — have all but destroyed Major League Baseball. When they expanded the season from 156 to 162 games. When they loaded up the leagues with more teams, climbing from sixteen to twenty-six. When they added the League Championship series. By creating more games — they thought America's appetite was limitless — they stuffed the golden goose with too much pate and it exploded.

Bits & Pieces  (1/12/02)
It was the teleprompter copy, which, according to Los Angeles Times' George Skelton, included comments "look there and bow" and "point to them and applaud." I mean, do you really need to put such notes in a script, let alone on prompter? Surely someone will see it, if not Burton, then the people who can see the prompter screens at the time of the delivery. Surely it will get out. Maybe they don't find it embarrassing.

Sexy Zahn Unzipped  (1/11/02)
It kinda takes your breath away when people who are supposed to know what they're doing demonstrate that their survival to date has been mostly luck. I'm thinking of the promotions department of CNN which this weekend aired a spot on Paula Zahn all of ten times before the head of the network and the chairman of the parent Turner Broadcasting killed it. The promotional announcement described Zahn as "sexy" and featured the sound of a zipper.

Don't Pick on Pilots  (1/10/02)
For all their potential vulnerability, there is little crime involving general aviation. Last year, all of 15 planes were reported stolen, and only 11 the year before. Mostly, criminal activity with small planes is tied in with drug smuggling, but with our impossibly porous borders, restricting general aviation ain't gonna stop a thing.

Anima Instinct  (1/09/02)
It is said that the only route to a lasting peace in the Middle East is for the Palestinian and Israeli women to act in concert to demand it. Makes sense. It was two women who started the peace process in Northern Ireland. Why might women be the pioneers to peace? Perhaps because they are inherently more invested in their offspring. Aristotle noted, "The reason why mothers are more devoted to their children than fathers is that they suffer more in giving them birth and are more certain that they are their own."

Dere Goes Duh Judge  (1/08/02)
In Florida, a man who spent 18 years on death row will not face a new trial, after a judge threw out his capital conviction. Turns out someone else confessed to the crime, years ago; plus of the two witnesses against the man at the original trial, one recanted his testimony and the other is dead. Not to mention the then-prosecutor withheld evidence. Which leaves the now prosecutor, in his own words, "with nothing to proceed on." But no apologies for the way the case was handled.

Separation Anxiety  (1/07/02)
The brouhaha, which was settled with kowtowic press releases and excessive public fawning, incited another colored group to demand a whole new department for Latin American Studies. The South-o'-the-Border effort may be stillborn, however, as one Harvard official pointed out that there was no movement until the Princeton bidding war appeared in the newspaper. Let Princeton have the whole lot, and they'll quickly discover they've got all poke and no pig.

It Ain't Art  (1/06/02)
How appropriate...a pissing contest, and thank me for not reporting more of the intoxicating repartee. Turn instead to Mark Twain who noted that we talk incessantly about sex, which we perform relatively rarely, and speak little of evacuation, which is a regular to frequent affair. And one that most of us choose to keep private.

Scheer Politics  (1/04/02)
Robert has often been ahead of the pack when it comes to understanding politics and world events, and is far out in front in understanding the policy failures that led to the terrorist attacks on September 11^th; and the pitfalls we face in stamping out terrorism and extricating ourselves from the conflict in Afghanistan. He also has infuriated a number of people by suggesting that some people are going overboard with some of their flag-waving.

Concern over Kashmir   (1/03/02)
A massive shift of our spiritual tectonic plates is causing a deep and growing sense of instability around the world. The cultures which are the most outta whack with reality -- those that avoid consciousness at all costs and deny equality for women — are suffering the greatest tremors of dislocation. But in their shallow if fervent religiosity, they tend to reach out for simple devils, lashing out while ignoring the truth.

New World Order  (1/02/02)
I thought about it a bit, and realized that boyswillbeboys, and that perhaps I shouldn't gripe about the tracks of their play. It was one of those conundrums that I wasn't likely to resolve very soon. Sure, I could harken back to my own upbringing, when everything was put back in its place when I had finished playing with it, but my father was a Freudian psychoanalyst.

Be It Re-Solved  (1/01/02)
Erranding among the masses during the day of The Eve, I could sense the growing anticipation among the myriad denizens cluttering the retail aisles, but they seemed more a preparatory than a cheery crowd. Blame the lackluster atmosphere on the continuing hopeless grey skies, or the world being turned upside down in September, or individual circumstances; it didn't feel like these folks were imbued with the party-animal airs that have manifest at previous year ends.

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