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Exporting Jobs    (12/31/03)
"Anything that is not nailed to the floor is being considered for outsourcing." What this means is that if what you do can be done elsewhere, it can probably be done for less money, and with the bottom line in our bottom-line capitalist society being the bottom line, you might think about another line of work.

Pick a Planet    (12/30/03)
In order to meet this enormous challenge of eradicating lethal poverty, we must direct our scientific efforts to meet our redefined needs of producing food, reducing population, and cleaning up our pollution. Exploring Mars or similar esoteric ventures when children are starving too death is enough to drive even healthy minds to distraction.

Observations    (12/29/03)
Sitting on the sidelines anyway were a bunch of history buffs unhappy at the way Pennsylvania officials were horning in on their activities. Among the government’s changes were try-outs for who would play Washington, and requirements that participants take medical exams, wear historically-accurate costumes, and bring written excuses if they miss rehearsals.

Ho, Ho, Ho    (12/26/03)
You can’t say those Maine lobstermen -- locally pronounced something like lahb-stah-mihn -- haven’t got a sense of humor. Two of the practical-joking variety decided to dress a lobster up in a costume and toss it back into the deep blue. The thought was that other lobstermen would find the lobster -- dressed in a Barbie outfit, by the way -- and would toss it back.

'Tis the Season    (12/25/03)
If I had family nearby, family with children, I might find myself in more of a celebratory mood, but I don’t and I’m not. Nor am I feeling curmudgeonly...a true sign of spiritual beneficence.

Tarnished White Hats    (12/24/03)
The FBI has now admitted involvement in dozens of murders in the Boston area, carried out by their informants. Yes, you read it right, the FBI was involved in murders so as to keep their snitches happy. In addition to allowing and enabling the killings, the FBI also knowingly sent innocent people to prison for the same reasons.

Peeves    (12/23/03)
A bunch of minor peeves have been collecting on my electronic desk. They are not important in the general scheme of things, but maybe you’ve encountered a similar situation and will use my illumination of the subject as an opportunity for a hearty, expiating "Yeah!"

Bits & Pieces    (12/22/03)
You’re gonna have to pay extra to see it, but there will be 14 models in bras and panties playing during the half-time. DaimlerChrysler was the original sponsor of the lacy brawl, but opted out, pulling Dodge’s logo and slogan "Grab Life by the Horns" from the scantily-clad skirmishers.

Leaderslip    (12/20/03)
If we are to look to the Democrats for rescue, relief and repair, I would have said, then we will need some Democrats who are ready to do more than vote right. We will need true leaders, not the kind who roll over for tax cuts, the unhealthy medicare bill, and the IraqAttaq. Will you be one of those leaders?

Sick with It    (12/19/03)
If we were doing It right, we wouldn’t send children to school or ourselves off to work if we weren’t feeling well. Not only would we want a speedy recovery from our afflictions, but we would also want to avoid afflicting others...on the school bus and the commuter train, in the classroom and the office.

Early Winter Storm    (12/18/03)
I was surprised to find blue in the skies above. I was surprised to see anything but a heavy grey fog. Surprise, surprise, the forecasters had slipped another cog. It was supposed to be rain until the ark floated away, and here there was a break in the storming. I had not planned on it, but I took full advantage.

Getting It Wright    (12/17/03)
The Wright brothers epitomize what is extraordinary about with our nation. They applied their pioneering minds and persevered with courage to answer a question that had eluded everyone before them. They did it, not for money, but to add a new dimension, literally to the lives of all who would follow.

Bits & Pieces    (12/16/03)
Scrooge is alive and well in Traverse City, Michigan, where the laborers at Tower Automotive received $15 gift cards redeemable at a local grocery-retail store, which was a nice thang of course. But then along came a note that the gift card was viewed as cash compensation and therefore taxable.

No Starch, Right    (12/15/03)
It may seem like a silly point, to be welcomed by a dry cleaner, but for me it was just another sign that I was back among the living. According to my view of a Larger Reality, there are always signs of us being on the right track or not, and these signs readily show up when we seek confirmation.

Bagged the Rat    (12/14/03)
The phone rang. It was his Rice-Cake calling with the good news. Well, ostensible and probably temporary good news. I mean, no one thought that Saddam should have been in power as long as he was, and mostly we’ve been arguing about whether or not we had to have this awful IraqAttaq to get rid of him.

Hillside Break    (12/12/03)
Truth be told, there are few roads in Mill Valley that couldn’t be called Hillside, or ridge-runner or ridiculous slope, or who thought they should put a road here. They’re all twisty, turning and narrow, usually little more than a single lane.

Bits & Pieces    (12/11/03)
Ozzy Osbourne fell of his ATV during a break from promoting his latest oeuvre. He broke his neck and a bunch of ribs but his injuries were not life threatening. There is some question about what there was to be threatened, but that question was clouded in heavy sedation.

Let Us Prey    (12/10/03)
Some of my best friends have been Dean supporters for a while now. Steve, who’s pretty smart, said he’d been cool to the good doctor, but is warming up to him. He said he can’t wait to see him in a debate with the prez. Let us prey.

Bang-Zoom-Wham    (12/09/03)
I suppose it’s possible to get things messed up, but I think you’d have to be not paying attention or else trying to test their instructional system. I was prepared to grimace and groan, but I didn’t have to. They’ve got it figured out, so good for them and better for us.

Bits & Pieces    (12/08/03)
Two men vying for a second seat on the board wound up tied with 1,141 votes each. Instead of forcing a new election, which would have cost the district some $85,000 -- that’s a lotta textbooks -- the candidates agreed to pull marbles out of bag, with the first to pull a white instead of colored marble declared the winner.

Black and Blues    (12/05/03)
Let’s get the facts, assessed by an informed and impartial expert. No one wants to repeat the 2001 riots that tore the very fabric of the city after a number of police killings of black people. Let us, too, demand that everyone accept the impartial judgement, and not use disproven charges to foment racial division.

Orts    (12/04/03)
The local Christian Copts decided to advertise their religion with the fish signs on their bumpers. Not to be outdone, the majority Egyptian Muslims got into the act with bumperstickers of sharks. Explained one Allah followah, "If they want to portray themselves as weak fishes, OK. We are the strongest."

Cut-Rate Dignity    (12/03/03)
They gotta be sitting on the edge of their seats waiting for the call from the lawyers. Bending over backwards to show their warm hearts, officials of the megastore called to ask about the condition of their shopper, apologize, and -- are you sitting down -- offer to put one of the cheap DVD players on hold for her. Be still my disk.

Buster    (12/02/03)
I wish I could have been with him, to say thank you in the final moments for his unflagging friendship, patience and grace. He was fourteen or so, and it was time, but that doesn’t make it a whole lot easier.

Bits & Pieces    (12/01/03)
Asked what his (deceased) parents would have thought about the name change, Bubba said, "I'm sure my dad probably would be shaking his head." If his son did that, you’d hear a sound was like a pea rattling around inside a boxcar.

Girls 'n Boys    (11/28/03)
The problem we have today is not about Republican or Democrat, liberal or conservative but about masculine and feminine. The plain fact is that we are confused about what it means to be a man and a woman in today’s society. This is partly a result of our failure to digest the women’s liberation movement properly, and our eternally being confused about sex.

The Deeper Pool    (11/27/03)
In a recent episode, a North Korean pianist wants to defect, but doing so would jeopardize nuclear talks with Pyongyang. Sheen recounts that the pianist told him of the word "Han" -- it was the title of the episode -- which means pain so deep no tears will come, but still there’s hope.

Hey, Behave!    (11/26/03)
The good health of our society rests on a presumption of decency and integrity. It’s bad enough when our political and corporate leaders fail to do the right thing, but when your average man on the street acts out of consort with reasonable social strictures, then the fabric of the society is torn, and they should be pushed outside of the city gates to feed the wolves.

Where's the Fridge?    (11/25/03)
The transition to clear and healthy thinking -- a society free of racism -- is probably not far away. It certainly isn’t out of reach. Another terrorist attack by Muslim fundamentalists, and you would see a lot of blacks and browns and yellows and reds and whites joining arms to fight the common enemy.

Bits & Pieces    (11/24/03)
Said the Italian newspaper Repubblica, the Bush administration is "going through a period of insanity that is worsening every day." The mayor of London commented, "I actually think that Bush is the greatest threat to life on this planet that we've most probably ever seen."

Uninterpretable Purposefulness    (11/21/03)
Before we left this morning, I was making a first check of my email and the headlines when I heard a thud, as though a small bough had fallen on the roof. But as my mind processed the sound, I knew before I turned my head and saw the small tuft of feathers on the window what had happened.

Ba$eball Whore$    (11/20/03)
Okay, I did watch some of the post-season baseball games, although truth be told, I didn’t have a team that I was rooting for, not National or American, or even the ‘Sox versus the Yankees. I have to insert this codicil for my biographers and anyone who knew me before I reached about thirty, during which earlier years I was a Yankee fan.

Bits & Pieces    (11/19/03)
It'’s a 21,700 pound satellite-guided GBU-43/B Massive Ordnance Air Blast Bomb, or MOAB, Mother of All Bombs. You can tell it’s mostly a lotta noise since they’re announcing it in advance, although they probably wanted to alert the locals as to why the earth may move for them.

Wal-to-Wal Marts    (11/18/03)
I think it is noble to want everyone to be able to earn a living wage, but suggest that we have arrived at a situation where circumstances now muddle the overall economic picture. We need to step back, strip the issues down to basics and reconsider exactly what are the problems and what are the solutions.

A Right Pol    (11/17/03)
Among the accomplishments in my life of which I have the greatest pride, one is getting my pal Clifford Waldeck elected to the Mill Valley City Council. That was back in 1997; he was re-elected four years later without my help. He’d done such a fine job in office that he was unopposed for a second term.

Bits & Pieces    (11/14/03)
According to doctors, he was bitten twice and the poison got into him so fast he was knocked unconscious for three days. The man says he thought the snake was 6½ to 7 feet long, and if that was the case, he’s lucky to have woken up at all.

News Bits    (11/13/03)
A mother in the Chicago area reported to her friends a tragic development. Her baby had cancer. Tapping into good hearts from miles around, the woman raised tens of thousands of dollars. Which she spent on herself. Turns out the boy didn’t have cancer. It was just a fundraising schtick.

Spackled Faith    (11/12/03)
Conferring with my confrere Bruce the other day, I averred, "There is a plan and just because I didn’t come up with it doesn’t mean I don’t have to follow it." My objection is that the plan, of whatever origin, is not a published work, and we or it doesn’t come with an instruction manual.

Bring 'Em On...Home    (11/11/03)
The generals and their string-pullers in Washington want us to hold tightly to the old saw that dying in uniform, regardless of the reason, is somehow heroic, which is frighteningly similar to the Palestinian view of martyrdom. Indeed, who could call it less than suicide to wear an American military uniform in the bloody triangle?

Magic Carpet Ride    (11/10/03)
I’m thinking it’s finally time to gather the significant threads that have woven this tapestry I fondly refer to as my life -- from the television news producer covering Watergate to the college instructor in Monterey, from directing a Congressional campaign in Illinois to earning a pilot’s license in Redding, plus all the personal stuff -- and make this carpet fly.

Strained Mercy    (11/07/03)
That seems like a lot of money when guilt is so obvious -- as with an insanity plea by one of a pair -- and suggests that there’s something wrong with the system that doesn’t make it more practical for the guilty to own up before they cost us even more.

Bits & Pieces    (11/06/03)
The White House is trying to explain why The Bush Boy hasn’t attended any funerals of Americans fallen in Iraq, or come out to express his sorrow with the shooting down of the Chinook helicopter on Sunday. They claim the president doesn’t want to show favoritism.

Moving On    (11/05/03)
With my departure from the rural wilds of the northern tip of the Sacramento Valley, induced by circumstances to leave the nest, I am imbued with an opportunity to refine my meaning of life, perhaps to come up with a new description of myself. Not a PR image, but a more accurate reflection of the person who’s looking back from the mirror.

Pitching Bubba    (11/04/03)
Listen up, Democrats. It’s not about conning the young rednecks; it’s about giving them the right reasons to vote for you. As Dean put it in a speech last winter, you pitch ‘em "because their kids don't have health insurance, either, and their kids need better schools, too."

Bits & Pieces    (11/03/03)
The questions were typical, about general health, insurance, income, work hours, enough money to eat, et cetera, and there were a bunch of questions about race. First, was I Latino or Hispanic? No, but I didn’t know there was a difference. Then was I Pacific Islander, Hawaiian and some other races, six in all, or maybe white? White, I confessed.

Guess Again    (10/31/03)
The questions were typical, about general health, insurance, income, work hours, enough money to eat, et cetera, and there were a bunch of questions about race. First, was I Latino or Hispanic? No, but I didn’t know there was a difference. Then was I Pacific Islander, Hawaiian and some other races, six in all, or maybe white? White, I confessed.

Smiling Faces    (10/30/03)
On this windless afternoon, I could hear the surf from a mile away. Aside from some mountain bikers crashing through the solitude, albeit briefly and joyfully, it is a very restful spot. The faces of the score or two of fellow strollers over the four miles are serene, smiling a shared knowingness at the Eden we have discovered.

Wide-Eyed Blind    (10/29/03)
A man came home to find his son and step-daughter drowned in the bathtub and his 32-year-old wife with her wrists slashed, thought not fatally. He told police she’d been under stress for some time. He also said, "We take comfort in knowing that Grace and Gabriel are together right now, in the loving arms of Christ."

Bits & Pieces    (10/28/03)
He drank a whole bunch of vodka and Coke with a friend and then jumped into the Niagara River. He went over the falls but survived, the only person to do so without special equipment. Said a friend, "I think he just reached the point where whatever happened was the best plan for him. If he made it, he might benefit with money. If he died, so be it."

Southland Fires    (10/27/03)
The future rides on the Santa Ana winds, those notorious dry gales with gusts of 100 mph that sweep through parts of Southern California like the devil’s broom. Compounded by unseasonably hot temperatures approaching triple digits, the winds will take a spark and turn it into an inferno.

Compound Tragedy    (10/24/03)
With lots more important things to do, both houses of the state legislature dropped ‘em, and voted aye on an emergency measure that gave Governor Jeb Bush the authority he asked them for to order that a feeding tube be inserted in the throat of a dying woman.

The Holy Boynking    (10/23/03)
It shows what a good job of vetting they do over at the Five-Sided Funny Farm that they promoted Army Lt. General William Boykin to serve as deputy undersecretary of defense. He probably said all the right things, and they just didn’t press him hard, to see if perhaps he wasn’t a bit too far right in those things he said.

Bits & Pieces    (10/22/03)
A California man was convicted of stabbing his pregnant, drug-addicted girlfriend, in what he claimed was an accident. His lawyer instructed the jury, "If you don't think he's lying, bad person, lousy drug addict, stinking thief jail bird, all that to the contrary, he's not guilty. It's as simple as that."

Fragments    (10/21/03)
Call it a boon or a plague or something in between, but part of my make-up requires that I collect epistemological fragments, sorta like a fly-strip catches dust. Often these bits will languish on scraps -- of paper on my desk, of bytes in my WRK file -- causing sighs as I think maybe I should develop them, and then thinking it might not be worth the effort.

A Princely Season    (10/20/03)
It’s cool in the mornings now, sometimes below 50. That may not sound cool to many parts of the country, but considering that only a couple of months ago, it was already 80 at eight in the morning, it’s cool. Particularly because we are on the south wall of a canyon, and Ole Sol takes his time climbing the ridge to cast his warmth across our dell.

Bits & Pieces    (10/17/03)
Every two years you have to take a refresher course on firearms safety. Our favorite instructor used to perform the four-hour sleep-deprivation ritual in a room in the downtown mall. This time it was held at the local Bible college.

Sammi's Animals    (10/16/03)
When I walk down the road to get the newspaper in the morning, he will wait until I’m out of sight and then plunk himself down in dust, lying completely still, waiting to surprise me on my return. Like Snoopy playing vulture in the Peanuts strip.

Nearer the Harbor    (10/15/03)
Checking the weather stats in the local rag, I noticed that the precip, as we weather afficionados call it, was below seasonal norm. Actually, the words that formed in my mind’s mouth were something like, "We’re below normal." And then I realized, not we; I’m outta here. I’m moving back to Mill Valley.

The Local Rag    (10/14/03)
When you live in a place like New York or Washington, you’re likely read The New York Times or the Washington Post and miss out on a whole ‘nother world. While those papers cover their local area to some extent, they are mostly focused on the big, as in global, picture. When you live in a place like Redding, you tend to be delivered less forest and more trees.

The Crime Beat    (10/13/03)
Also on the lam, 40 former Taliban prisoners, including a number of commanders, who tunneled out of captivity from a prison in southern Afghanistan. At least until this recent decline in its rolls, it was referred to as a high-security prison.

Edifice Wrecks    (10/10/03)
Since they’ve been in charge, they have made the wrong decisions for the wrong reasons based on data they knew to be wrong. Now, as the edifice wrecks, Condi and Rummy fight, Guantanamo leaks important information to terrorists like a sieve, and Bush-Lite is in New Hampshire telling the folks what a fine job he’s done.

A Broader View    (10/09/03)
Dowd wrote, "Feminism died in 1998 when Hillary allowed henchlings and Democrats to demonize Monica as an unbalanced stalker, and when Gloria Steinem defended Mr. Clinton against Kathleen Willey and Paula Jones by saying he had merely made clumsy passes, then accepted rejection, so there was no sexual harassment involved."

Bits & Pieces    (10/08/03)
Candidates have much tougher races there; in the current run-up to state and municipal elections, sixteen of them have been murdered. It’s not as bad as the last election, but there are still three weeks to go. The killings have been the work of leftist extremists, rightist extremists, along with some common criminals.

Color Commentator    (10/07/03)
I don’t know about the player or the media coverage. Many people rallied behind the quarterback, declaring he was getting the good treatment he deserved. Meanwhile, the press poo-poo’d the notion that they would ever speak with a gloved tongue. Yeah, right.

A Political Shame    (10/06/03)
This kind of gutter politics is a disgrace to the very idea of public discourse and the democratic process. If there are issues to be raised, raise them immediately. Holding them until the last few days before the campaign is a treasonous act designed to undermine the election process.

Pulling the Power    (10/03/03)
Audrey reached over and pulled the power. The propeller kept turning, but not with the necessary vigor to move the plane forward. It’s a good thing such aircraft as the Cessna Skyhawk we were flying were designed to glide rather than plummet to the earth when you stop feeding the engine fuel.

Bits & Pieces    (10/02/03)
The Supreme Court of New Hampshire ruled that it may be garbage, but it’s still covered by a presumption of privacy. In a 4-to-1 decision, the top judges in the Live Free or Die state said there must be a presumption of privacy even when the garbage is bagged and sitting on the curb.

Don't Eat the Yellowcake   (10/01/03)
Robert Novak is refusing to divulge who told him that the former State Department official who said Niger wasn’t selling yellowcake to Saddam was married to a CIA operative. That’s confusing on the face, but let’s parse it because this scandal seems to point to the sanctum inner mostest at the White House.

'Round the Bend    (09/30/03)
And they’re coming around the final turn, heading for home. Neigh, you say, or maybe nay. At least here in California, where the recall election is a week away and most people aren’t terribly pleased with their choices.

More than A Touch of Class    (09/29/03)
Glenda Jackson won an Oscar, her second, for the 1973 film A Touch of Class. In that movie, she portrayed a bright, charming, funny, liberated woman who epitomized class in all its strength and dignity. I got to tell her that on Friday, when we met for lunch in San Francisco.

California Debate    (09/26/03)
The biggest row was a mythic open wound between our two top immigrants, one from Greece and the other from Austria, one a writer the other an actor, an intellectual and a muscleman, a she and a he. She went after him and he went after her.

Fleecing the Lame    (09/25/03)
This commerce is a sordid aspect of our society. We should purchase what we need, not squander resources because some not-even-clever huckster tickles our brainstem with the glint of a bauble or the sizzle of salt-‘n-grease.

Runner : Marathon    (09/24/03)
The assault against intellectualism continues with the ongoing dumbing down of the SAT’s, those notorious college admissions tests that were the challenge of every ambitious high schooler intending to advance. Back in the old days, those tests meant something, as in where you might receive a college education.

Those Liberals    (09/23/03)
Indeed, name-calling damnable pols gets in the way of resolving our problems. It’s a diversion, like trying to fix our ghettos by focusing on skin color instead of poverty, violence, and ignorance. Or ranting about Red China when the issue isn’t communism but brutal domination by the psycho-crooks running the government for their own purposes.

Musings    (09/22/03)
Not knowing if the calf was ill or weak or needed the shade to see his computer screen better, there was clearly some sort of understanding on the part of Elsie and her friends that shade was needed and by god they provided it. It’s tough, sometimes, to forget about what, and nearly whom, we eat.

Bits & Pieces    (09/19/03)
An Italian study says eating pizza can reduce your chance of getting cancer. Well, not yours necessarily, but if you lived in Italy and ate pizza at least once a week, you would be much less likely to get cancer of the esophagus and colon.

World Snooze Tonite    (09/18/03)
A country music star and a television actor, as popular as they might have been, are not worth that kinda of time nor the top of the show. And to make matters worse, Jennings’ newscast closed with a report on what it means if your cat watches television; he’s slower than a normal cat, apparently.

Scaria    (09/17/03)
Scalia is so far to the right, he’s gotta worry about falling off the edge of the earth. He should worry less about falling and more about being pushed. He’s not well liked, except by his friends and admirers, but most others who know anything about him consider him a little too tightly wrapped.

Wanding a Naked Emperor    (09/16/03)
Mr. Bush doesn’t know what to do; he says he’s open to suggestions, all but begging for help from the United Nations and our former allies whom we snubbed going in. That’s the good news. The bad news is that no one has a clue what to do about Iraq or Afghanistan or global terrorism.

Open Auditions    (09/15/03)
Somehow, the Bush Administration will be history a year from January 21^st, and though they can do a lot of damage in the interim, there are perhaps enough concerned citizens on Capitol Hill to keep them somewhat in check and preserve the nation in a state that the next administration will have a mandate to repair.

Before the Fall    (09/13/03)
Mrs. Schwarzenegger spoke well and made a strong case for her husband as a person, someone she’s known for more than 20 years; she might have been a candidate herself. That’s not enough reason to vote for him, however.

Right on the Wing    (09/12/03)
Bud feels that he and Don, being 15 years older than I, have sorta taken me under their political wing. In no time at all, Bud thinks, I’ll be listening to El Rushbaugh. So you won’t be surprised to learn that from Bud I got a copy of the Ann Coulter’s book Treason.

Bits & Pieces    (09/11/03)
The green flyers would be the safe ones and they could go through security quickly. The yellow ones would require a second look. And the red ones would be shot at when they went for their boarding pass. Oh goody, another plan, but no one has yet explained how 19 people got through security two years ago carrying boxcutters.

Frequent Orbiter Miles    (09/10/03)
In mathematical terms, our dear planet Earth has traveled some 30,969,892,800 miles around Old Sol since I was born, and spun on its axis an additional 483,956,250 miles in that time.

Slick and Slicker    (09/09/03)
No, I’m not a racist pig trying to white-out all the other cultures. I’m a proud mongrel who celebrates myriad different heritages, but only after we agree, in English, that the people of the United States of America form one nation indivisible, and we come first.

Say What, Amigo?    (09/08/03)
No, I’m not a racist pig trying to white-out all the other cultures. I’m a proud mongrel who celebrates myriad different heritages, but only after we agree, in English, that the people of the United States of America form one nation indivisible, and we come first.

Kibbitz to Death    (09/05/03)
As the latest would-be truce between Israel and their Palestinian neighbors blows apart, one rues the very possibility that this rift will ever be healed. It is like the myth of the grail quest, and the Fisher King with the wound in his thigh that won’t close.

None of the Above    (09/04/03)
While people dislike the governor more than even Richard Nixon, they don’t like the very idea of the recall and they are blaming the Republicans for it. If one of the alternatives doesn’t start looking better soon, they might not unseat Davis.

Choir Preaching    (09/03/03)
Because the district is so Republican, the Democrats can’t seem to field a candidate to run a decent race against Herger. It’s too bad, because they could beat him if they would put up someone with a brain and heart, and maybe a dog named Toto.

Worm Boy    (09/02/03)
With these viruses, we lose some of our feeling of stability that is invested in the belief that the vast majority of people with whom we share the planet would not hurt us. These viruses, which attack huge numbers of people the perpetrator didn’t know and never thought of, are gratuitously assaultive.

Here Come Duh Fall    (09/01/03)
The rest of my life is perfect, except that I live so far from the ocean, and in a spiritually-hardscrabble town that in my five-plus years still doesn’t have a good restaurant. I was in Mill Valley this past weekend, a town a sixth the size of Redding, and had a delicious meal.

Injudiciousness    (08/29/03)
For years, NASA officials have held themselves above the fray, as if their own divine guidance, instead of diligence and integrity, would see them through. Them, yes; seven astronauts, no.

Bits & Pieces    (08/28/03)
For years, NASA officials have held themselves above the fray, as if their own divine guidance, instead of diligence and integrity, would see them through. Them, yes; seven astronauts, no.

Heroes for Peace    (08/27/03)
Some of our very finest citizens were killed in these ventures, heroically at times, achieving worthy goals at times, and we forever will mourn their loss to their family and community. But for all their courage and purpose, drained out crimson on a foreign field, we lost twice because these important lives were not invested in building a better world.

Tird Grade    (08/26/03)
The fact that these children -- a fifth of those who took the Florida test -- failed to pass is a major indictment of those who have failed them already. While it’s a simple matter to point a finger at the schools -- kindergarten, first and second grades -- for passing students who weren’t likely reading at the earlier grade levels, the finger points straight at the parents.

Sub-Continental Support   (08/25/03)
So when I call up and I hear that unusual, to my ears, lilt, I feel all warm inside that America is being a good planetary neighbor. I turn off the ubiquitous classical strains emanating from my computer, stick a finger in the other ear, and listen with all the intention of a constipatee.

Bits & Pieces   (08/22/03)
The government is seeking ways to speed up the boarding of the planes, but the Electronic Privacy Information Center is concerned that such information could be used for other purposes, such as to arrest criminals. It’s not clear why they would oppose such activity.

Raise the Children   (08/21/03)
Most were getting a third-rate education and would need years of tutoring and substantial financial support and they would still not be likely to catch up to their peers. So much learning takes place in early childhood that it’s impossible replicate in later years.

Angel Fallen   (08/20/03)
The man laughing in this photo looks like an angel, and the senseless tragedy of his death is enough to question the existence of god, anyone’s god. Said his spokesman in Iraq, "I grieve for him, I grieve for his family. I grieve most of all for people of Iraq." I wish I felt as generous.

Power Crisis   (08/19/03)
Was it a terrorist attack? And the answer, if you think about things politically, is Yes, it was perpetrated by a series of Republican and Democratic presidents and Congresses, governors and legislators, who did nothing despite mounting evidence that our power system was fragile and vulnerable -- not only to terrorists but to acts of our own god.

Bits & Pieces   (08/18/03)
The Chief Justice of the Alabama Supreme Court says he won’t obey a federal order to remove a stone monument of the Ten Commandments that he spirited into the court building in the middle of the night a coupla years ago. Some folks complained about church-‘n-state separation and a federal judge agreed.

Power Politics   (08/15/03)
The basic purpose of government, after all, is to see to it that basic services are provided in an uninterrupted fashion. We expect lights to come on when we flick the switch, water to flow when we turn on the tap, cops to show up at accidents and fire trucks at fires.

The Weather Gods   (08/14/03)
Of course, maybe the gods are just throwing me a pity party because of all the complaining I do about the insufferable heat. In which case, while I don’t appreciate the sentiments, I’m most pleased with the results.

Castles in the Air   (08/13/03)
There was a time when I used to say aloud, and somewhat embarrassingly in retrospect, that this was my last trip. I believed, or else was trying to sways the powers that be, that I was so flipping conscious that when I finished this lifetime I wouldn’t be coming back.

Bits & Pieces   (08/12/03)
NASA loves a happy story and arranged a post-nuptial press conference, with the bride appearing next to a cardboard cut-out of her new husband. Said the bride of the intragalactic ceremony: "It was cool; it went straight to the heart."

Governor Moi   (08/11/03)
A number of people encouraged me to run, and I might have, ‘cause I would have been the best governor in the history of the world, except that I probably wouldn’t have won because I wouldn’t have made a good candidate.

Circus Mediamess   (08/08/03)
Though their presence was a clear boon to the town of Eagle, Colorado, where sits the court house, the sea of satellite dishes and TV trailers would have surpassed Potter Stewart’s definition of obscenity. The coverage was even worse. CNN was going live with the Bryant arrival, whipping up a frenzy of irrelevance over what was going to be a nothing hearing.

Ding-a-ling Dell   (08/07/03)
When the Japanese started serious exporting of cars to the United States in the 1970's, most buyers were very happy with their purchases. But then as they began to expand their sales effort, they wound up going through American dealerships. Suddenly much of what had been a world-class experience slipped into the cheese. Not because they were American, but because they had an old-world car dealer mentality.

Sports No More   (08/06/03)
They are worth it to the franchise who wins games and attracts fans, both to $150 seats on the home court and to the idiot box, where sporting events proliferate like viagral rabbits. The fact is that if there weren’t an audience for this surrogate banality the money wouldn’t be there.

Run, Dick, Run   (08/05/03)
California deserves better government and the people know it. They aren’t demanding immediate solutions so much as people of integrity whom they can trust to find those solutions. They want honest, competent leadership dedicated not to special interests but to the future of California, to create a better future for our children and their children.

Bush League   (08/04/03)
The numbers don’t look so good, however, when you realize that (1) the military isn’t producing anything anyone can buy, (2) making war is a big part of the record deficits, and (3) if they let the troops come home, the unemployment rate would shoot even higher.

Summer Rain   (08/02/03)
This week, Redding was actually the hottest spot on the planet, temperature-wise, when (relative) cold waves struck the world’s deserts and our mercury climbed to 116 degrees. It’s been hotter, but that’s toasty, and nothing to boast about.

Our Crooks   (08/01/03)
It used to be that whenever I heard folks complaining about big government, I tuned them out as broken records. Indeed, they’re usually over the edge. But sometimes they have a point, and lately I’ve wondered if they aren’t screaming loudly enough.

Leaderslip   (07/31/03)
Mr. Bush told a news conference that he was taking responsibility for the nuke no-no, that the danger of terrorism was up but then didn’t explain why it was okay that the Department of Homeland Spuriousness had been thinking of firing air marshals to save money, and that the economy was heading up.

Bits & Pieces   (07/30/03)
New sports stadia are costing the federal coffers a hunnert million a year because they are financed with tax exempt bonds. This from the Washington Post, which records that more than $7 billion was spent on sports venues in the past 13 years, with zillionaires profiting at the expense of the average taxpayer.

Elephant Graveyard   (07/29/03)
Up here in the wilds of the North State, we are represented in the legislature by two GOPers who are now struggling with the impacts of their party’s insistence on drawing a line in the sand below the water line. Said one pol’s flack, "What we hear is not good for rural counties. It looks pretty bad."

Bits & Pieces   (07/28/03)
Allstate is running a TV commercial that uses a chess game as a metaphor for buying insurance. It’s clever to a point, and that is that they show the white king’s opening position on a black square. As everyone who plays the game knows, the king starts on his own color.

News Junkie's Dream   (07/26/03)
Most days, as a result of obsessively perusing the news wires, I’ll send out a few breaking or outrageous news items to my newsgroup list. On Thursday, I sent out nine, which only partially reflected the incredible flow of history in the making.

This Sporting Crime   (07/25/03)
I still keep an eye on the news headlines and when there’s something sportif in them, it’s usually less about the game and more about the player. All too often, particularly over the last fifteen years or so -- to the point that it’s become a sick joke -- those sports people making news have a legal problem.

Suspect on Ice   (07/24/03)
In Chicago, the police on Tuesday put out a community alert for a man suspected in a series of sexual assaults. He was described as a black male in his mid-20's who "resembles the popular rap artist ‘Ice Cube.’" And what a kerfuffle they caused.

Bits & Pieces   (07/23/03)
Another Bush official has taken responsibility for the nuke-up in the State of the Union Address. Stephen Hadley, the deputy national security adviser, was the latest to fall on the sword, which is drawing so many victims, it might be called a Bush-kabob.

Cheesoid News   (07/22/03)
They mark their success, or lack thereof, purely by the numbers. They seem to care little if their audience understands the currency of events, or simply sits glassy-eyed in a puddle of electronic drool. Their motivation is to make money by attracting eyeballs for the counters; they don’t care about the results.

The Kerry Campaign   (07/21/03)
Whoever would be the lead donkey would be the prime target of the Bush re-election politburo and the neo-con radio ranters. Why get in their sights this early when there’s little real value in being the leader? It makes more sense to wait until the New Year, raising money and meeting as many decision-makers and likely voters as possible until then.

Witches' Brew   (07/19/03)
Greenspan is like George Tenet: he says what the White House wants him to say, to support their lies, even though he knows better. The fact that he’s raising these pinkish red flags should be a clue that what really lies ahead is not going to be a picnic.

Bits & Pieces   (07/18/03)
There were surely a bunch of legal issues that determined the move, but ya gotta wonder if counties shouldn’t be able to bid for big cases, like cities do for the Olympics. With the descending of the media, it could be a financial windfall for the community.

Purr, Wag, Drool   (07/17/03)
He is such a dear creature, he’s well worth the dust he leaves in his wake; it’s like Pigpen has walked across the desk. Sometimes he stretches his feet out towards the keyboard, as though he has something to write, or he maybe he just wants to hush my fingers.

Bits & Pieces   (07/16/03)
After earlier political ventures, Springer gained celebrity for a television program that featured trash trashing trash, sometimes violently. It’s hard to imagine that his thinking would bring down Congress.

Forgiveness Priorities   (07/15/03)
No question but that this guy had to be separated from children, ‘cause parents of our species get fussy when strangers fondle their offspring, but life in prison? This, while George Tenet -- whose alleged miscreance cost thousands of lives and a quarter-trillion dollars -- not only doesn’t go to prison but gets to keep his job?

"Darn Good"   (07/14/03) -- Bastille Day Special
If there weren’t lives being lost, if the White House weren’t projecting -- and remember the source -- a $4 billion monthly tab for Iraq into the foreseeable future, this story might be ignored, but they are and it can’t.

Bits & Pieces   (07/14/03)
In response, an Italian under-secretary, responsible for tourism of all things, wrote a public letter complaining about too many Germans vacationing on Italian beaches, referring to Deutschland as "a country intoxicated with arrogant certainties." Whatever that means.

That Fish Smell   (07/12/03)
They have lied, over and over again, and they continue to lie. The finger-pointing going on over the responsibility for the president lying during his State of the Union address about Saddam’s nuclear program is shameless and shameful.

Who's on First?   (07/11/03)
Sir, it just looks bad. It really isn’t.
How can you say it isn’t bad? There’s more fighting every day. The mothers are calling us occupiers and threatening a holy war against us.
Mullahs, sir.

Book Me...Please   (07/10/03)
My idea of a great vacation -- or a great life, for that matter -- is to be plunked down in a beach house with a stack of books and few obligations. But when I’m not on vacation, I still love to read, even though I spend most of my waking hours in front of this computer screen, reading and writing.

Shame on Our Game   (07/09/03)
It is the sort of moral bankruptcy and corruption you’d expect, maybe, in a third world country, but this is the United States, the vanguard of justice and decency. It’s shameful that in our country, a simple clerical problem would be enough to lock someone up and prevent her from speaking with her children.

Bits & Pieces   (07/08/03)
PETA, the animal protection people, are complaining that the KFC web site contains false information about the breeding and killing of chickens. They are suing KFC and their parent, YUM, demanding that they use less batter on the truth.

Erase Race   (07/07/03)
They are the ones who rush to the microphone, shouting "Racism!" whenever a boggled sports figure or cobwebbed pol utters social thinking from a bygone era. Their vituperation is akin to the right-wing loonies who were spotting commies under every bed in the Fifties.

This Fourth   (07/05/03)
It is an extraordinary -- in a sense, holy -- document. It breaks with history and demands freedoms that really weren’t on the table before. Along with the Bill of Rights and subsequent contemporizing, it enfranchises everyone to live freely and to pursue their individual happiness.

Bits & Pieces   (07/04/03)
There’s another reason for regretting this policy. Aside from the gross deceit and malfeasance, there has also been the commitment and consumption of resources. By invading Iraq, we compromised our ability to act in areas and circumstances that were more deserving of our attention, e.g., Africa.

"Bring Them On"   (07/03/03)
There’s another reason for regretting this policy. Aside from the gross deceit and malfeasance, there has also been the commitment and consumption of resources. By invading Iraq, we compromised our ability to act in areas and circumstances that were more deserving of our attention, e.g., Africa.

Bogie's Rose   (07/02/03)
It may not be a big deal in the general scheme of things, and yet it sticks in the craw. To issue a press release instead of commenting personally suggests he never recognized the breath-catching quality of her extraordinary life, but still grabbed for a share of her headlines.

Updating Marriage   (07/01/03)
It doesn’t make sense to think people coupling today will stay together forever. We should encourage healthy relationships, according logical rights of privacy and concern to the partners, but we should also enable those who make mistakes to extract themselves reasonably and without penalty or undue opprobrium.

Bits & Pieces   (06/30/03)
It does seem kinda tacky, and leaves one wondering what’s next. Perhaps a special note, like "Hi, guys, I was yer waitress. My name is Tammi. I have five children who are starving. Please help with a big tip."

"1876"   (06/27/03)
Samuel Tilden measured the difference between two corrupt parties this way. "I have always thought that only as a Democrat, reflecting Jefferson and Jackson, could justice ever be done the people because, at this moment in history, ours is the only party which is even faintly responsive to the force of ideas."

Bits & Pieces   (06/26/03)
Kudos to the Black-Robed Nine for knocking down Texas’ 30-year-old sodomy law. The vote was 6-to-3 with Rehnquist, Scalia, and Thomas in opposition. Makes it purdy darn clear how tightly wrapped that trio is, judging the private behavior of people behind close doors.

Arnold of Pyrrhus   (06/25/03)
Who would want to take the helm of the Titanic, post-iceberg? Wouldn’t it make more sense to stay above the fray, appearing loyal and noble, and let Arnold deal with the mess?

Solstice   (06/24/03)
Ole Sol has reached the apex of his annual climb and is now heading back down south where he belongs. Soon, the lengthening nights will protect us from the harsh oppressive rays that dessicate the very life out of mortals beings and leave them withered on the vine of life like so much jerky.

Bits & Pieces   (06/23/03)
They had first listened to Wagner's "Ride of the Valkyries" to get charged up for the mission, then they smashed through iron gates. Our guys dragged out a half-dozen men, weapons and a computer disk, while women wailed. It’s not clear if the music helped.

Bits & Pieces   (06/21/03)
McDonald’s sued an Italian food critic for saying their burgers taste of rubber and their fries of cardboard. Some would say that the review was generous. If you’ve eaten at McDonald’s, you recognize that the meat has a bounce to it and their fries are of a rather drab consistency.

Positive Discrimination   (06/20/03)
Did you know that in Mother England they refer the same practice as "positive discrimination"? All in the spin, I guess. Both programs sanctioned the selection of people of color and other workplace minorities, when all other criteria -- talent, experience, plays well with others -- were equal.

Bits & Pieces   (06/19/03)
The 30-year-old mother of two girls went to the competition on Friday night with her husband, and returned the next night to participate after they heard the event needed more people to jar each other’s brains free from their crania.

Keep Privates Private   (06/18/03)
At issue is whether two adults can do mostly what they want in the privacy of their own home. It seems that most Texans feel they shouldn’t, and they are supported by myriad conservative and/or religious groups who say that not only is such behavior wrong, it should be illegal.

Bits & Pieces   (06/17/03)
The people should never have been arrested in the first place; they should never have been tried. They were among 38 -- 10% of the town’s black population -- who were convicted solely on the testimony of this patently-corrupt investigator.

Le Juggernaut Gris   (06/16/03)
This is a very thick plot, and since none of the current players has been through it before, one can expect a spectacle of shrill voices, serious gaffes, major strategy failures and some indeliberately suicidal tactics.

The Peace-Makers   (06/14/03)
He’s been busy charming dozens of women, many of whom accepted his proposal for marriage. Several of them received engagement rings and had planned their weddings, all on the basis of phone calls and the Internet. Seems, however, that he lied to them, claiming to be six-four when he’s only five-nine. And he’s no spring chicken at 50 years old, plus he’s married.

TripTych   (06/13/03)
He’s been busy charming dozens of women, many of whom accepted his proposal for marriage. Several of them received engagement rings and had planned their weddings, all on the basis of phone calls and the Internet. Seems, however, that he lied to them, claiming to be six-four when he’s only five-nine. And he’s no spring chicken at 50 years old, plus he’s married.

Peace to Scumbags   (06/12/03)
Only when people give up the slaughter of innocents, when they stop preaching hatred from hearth to altar, can a society grow a healthier generation. Among people who have lived with both peace and war, the vast majority prefer the former. Remember how different it felt before Nine-Eleven? Wasn’t that better?

Hillary Agonistes   (06/11/03)
The Lovely Linda finds her escape from the daily horrors of family law in front of the television, usually watching "talent" contests and home decorating shows. I sit across the room on the couch, smile lovingly through clenched teeth, and make notes on the trailing edge of the decline and schmaltz of western civilization.

The Idiot Box   (06/10/03)
The Lovely Linda finds her escape from the daily horrors of family law in front of the television, usually watching "talent" contests and home decorating shows. I sit across the room on the couch, smile lovingly through clenched teeth, and make notes on the trailing edge of the decline and schmaltz of western civilization.

Bits & Pieces   (06/09/03)
Soon they would have us be disgraced for taking a nip from a bottle, describing a clean room as spic-and-span, dancing a jig, gig a frog, asking for kraut on our dog, or keeping a pet guinea pig. The real disgrace is that this legislation even made it to the floor.

Miscellany   (06/06/03)
A U.S. district judge sentenced the self-proclaimed "Guru of Ganja" to a day in the pokey -- that’s time served -- for growing marijuana. Ed Rosenthal had been cultivating a weed harvest to supply cannabis clinics, which is legal according to California law, but the feds went after him.

Bits & Pieces   (06/05/03)
After more than a year of investigating, the feds indicted her for stock shenanigans. Stewart is only a little less popular than Leona Helmsley, and most of it, as with Helmsley, is of her own making. If she hadn’t been greedy, if she’d fessed up early, she might not be facing a possible prison stretch.

What's in a Name   (06/04/03)
Further complicating the problem are the hyper-scumbags, who are threatening to launch suicide attacks against Americans in Iraq. They are being cheered on by the myriad disparate Iraqi elements that find traction in bad-mouthing their liberators. This is not a healthy situation.

A Darker Shade of Gray   (06/03/03)
A man whose idea of leadership was to do nothing, he botched the energy crisis in 2000 through ambivalence and delay. His incessant failure to act has led California into a budget deficit of dangerous dimension.

The Concorde   (06/02/03)
Ya gotta think that with all the money we spend on military technology, we should be able to figure out how to fly faster than 600 mph without breaking windows. Surely we haven’t reached the apex of flight. Surely we shouldn’t have to take a step backwards, as the shutting down of Concorde service implies.

Miscellany   (05/30/03)
Davis pocketed almost $200,000 from the Morongo Indians, whose new 23-story, $250-million casino resort hotel will be, according to tribal leaders, "a symbol of Native American determination." Speculation that the new building was designed to look like Davis’ scalp has been denied.

Bits & Pieces   (05/29/03)
The 35-year-old woman is an American who converted to Islam a while back, and she says her god would think her unchaste for revealing her face. Point one, in most Muslim countries where women are allowed to drive, they show their faces for their license. Point two, as my pal Peter notes, someone whose face is mostly covered up shouldn’t be driving ‘cause she can’t see well.

No, Honest   (05/28/03)
I probably should add that unless the information contained therein isn’t an obvious and intentional product of my own leetle grey cells, I cannot vouch for the accuracy, authorship, or authenticity. And even if it is mine, I still can’t sometimes.

The Outer Banks   (05/27/03)
The beach here was and is marvelous. The water is far more enjoyable than it is further north, warmed as it is by the Gulf Stream which runs about a mile off-shore. The fresh seafood is delicious, and the local vegetables delucious. Kitty Hawk drew us for two weeks every summer for four decades, with only a few years missed.

Red Hot Poker   (05/26/03)
Turns out she hadn’t been shot or stabbed as had been originally reported. Also, it seems that the Iraqi military had fled the scene a coupla days before the daring raid. The teen hero from Appalachia says she doesn’t remember anything. Wag, wag, wag the dog.

Memorial Day Weekend   (05/23/03)
Memorial Day is the start of summer. It used to be on May 30^th for the longest time, and then for the benefit of mattress retailers, it was shifted to the last Monday of the month. Way back when, holidays meant something; they were celebrated on the same day every year, as a reminder of why they were holidays.

Prostitutes and Whores   (05/22/03)
The bimbette brigade -- both male and female -- project less depth than the extras in a high school performance of "Grease," mispronouncing and mis-cuing their way through important events with a chewing-gum effervescence -- Thanks very much for that great report, Lance -- that could choke Jonah’s whale.

Father and Son   (05/21/03)
He couldn’t really describe it, but said that he felt a oneness with everything. He said he’d had a coupla similar experiences, and responded to them similarly. He dismissed them, with little more thought than they were intellectual indigestion. So much for exploiting epiphanies. Or even looking into them.

The City   (05/20/03)
I hadn’t been back to New York since the terrorist attack, and though the down economy was no doubt causing pain and concern, there was still to me an atmosphere of pre-recovery. The attacks were an outrage in so many ways, but principally, they seemed unfair.

Bits & Pieces   (05/19/03)
Hatfill got out of his car to take a photograph of the tailers and they seem to have run over his foot; or something, it’s not really clear. It wasn’t so bad that he needed medical attention. However, he was fined $5 for disrupting traffic.

Paenuttiest  (05/16/03)
A sign in the produce section of the local Safeway advertised special paenuts. I checked the label on the package to see if someone thought the misspelling was purposeful. Nope. Kinda like the way the world is these days; not only nutty but they can’t spell it.

Madness and Medals  (05/15/03)
"Men went mad and were rewarded with medals." In war that probably makes sense. Considering that most soldiers never fire their weapons at the enemy, considering many say they would rather be killed than kill someone else, it’s easy if macabre to understand how it might take madness of sorts to explode into a battlefield success.

Bits & Pieces   (05/14/03)
The purpose is to thwart counterfeiters. What’s unclear is why it’s not easier to pass phoney money with so many bills -- and all those new quarters -- looking unfamiliar, at best. Excuse me, could you change this $18 bill? Sure, would you like three sixes or two nines.

Anchor White   (05/13/03)
He was the late evening anchor and I the producer at the CBS affiliate in Providence, Rhode Island, for three months back in 1975. We had immediate chemistry, and the ratings showed it. We gained seven share point on the competition in that short time. The reason: we were serious about journalism and understood television.

From the Latin, Servitium   (05/12/03)